


For Good

by fearlessly



Category: Glee, klaine - Fandom
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Angst, Domestic Violence, Drug Use, Fluff (later chapters), Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, Love, M/M, Smut (Later chapters)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-10
Updated: 2015-09-05
Packaged: 2018-04-13 23:03:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 27,421
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4540809
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fearlessly/pseuds/fearlessly
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Blaine’s love – it had always been constant. Even when he had cheated Kurt knew that Blaine loved him - before, during, and after. So why was he trying to resist? Why couldn’t he allow himself to fall into the arms of his one true love?</p><p> </p><p>Thanks for reading.<br/>I own nothing.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue - All or Nothing

It was a spring day. The sun was shining beyond interspersed clouds. Kurt sat on the red and white checkered picnic blanket in the courtyard of McKinley High. There was so much commotion around him, students passing by, over-exuberant voices in the background, the sound of traffic along the adjacent street … yet he was only focused on one thing – one person: Blaine. Blaine and those damned eyes. Behind those long dark lashes his gaze illustrated something in-between heart-breaking and mesmerizing. It would be easy for Kurt to fall right into them and tangle himself into Blaine’s love again. Blaine’s love – it had always been constant. Even when he had cheated Kurt knew that Blaine loved him - before, during, and after. So why was he trying to resist? Why couldn’t he allow himself to fall into the arms of his one true love? That’s what Blaine was and Kurt knew that he would continue to be for the rest of his life – come what may. Come what may.

Blaine’s eyes. Usually, they were hazel but today they took on more of a green lustre as they played off the yellow bowtie he was wearing – the one which matched his tight yellow jeans. His white polo shirt was crisp against his sculpted olive-toned arms. His hair was perfectly gelled and his smile was genuine and adorable, as always. Blaine. Genuine and adorable. Always.

“Just please say that you and I can be boyfriends again,” Blaine pleaded gently.

Kurt tried his hardest to resist. He had been resisting all week. He knew what Blaine had been up to these past days and Kurt really wanted to just sink into him like old times. After all, Blaine had been there to help him through his Dad’s cancer. He had been a true friend – that had never changed. He really just wanted to take Blaine into his arms and profess his love but he just couldn’t. Too much time had passed, too much had happened to both he and Blaine. He knew that eventually they would end up together – they were soulmates after all but he wasn’t ready. If they rushed back into a relationship now it would never work. They both needed time to breathe and grow on their own because when they were to eventually come together it would be for good. At least this is what Kurt told himself.

“I can’t,” Kurt tore his gaze from Blaine’s pleading eyes.

“Please Kurt, can we just try?”

“We’re not ready, Blaine.”

“I’m ready. I’m really ready Kurt. I need you in my life. You’re my everything.” He scooted closer to Kurt on the blanket.

“And you are mine, which is why no matter what paths we take we will find each other again and when we do it will be glorious because we’ll be ready to commit and to trust,” Kurt said almost in a whisper.

Blaine pressed his lips together and hung his head. “You still don’t trust me?”

“I’m desperately trying to.”

“Okay.” Blaine made to get up.

“Hey. Whoa. Wait a minute,” Kurt said. “You’re just going to leave?”

Blaine looked down at him with a sad and confused look on his face. “What else is there for me to do? You told me no.” His arms flailed up defeated.

“But that doesn’t mean we can’t hang out as friends. We’ve always been friends, Blaine. I need you to be my friend – no one else can keep me grounded like you can.”

Blaine scoffed. “Are you serious?”

Kurt stood up so that they could be face to face again. “You don’t want to be my friend?”

“Kurt, I want to be your friend, your boyfriend, your lover, your… more than anything.” He stepped forward and placed a gentle hand on Kurt’s elbow. “But for me, it has to be all or none at all. Do you know how hard it is for me to hang out with you and not be able to call you mine? To not be able to caress your beautiful face, intertwine my fingers with yours, or kiss those sweet lips? No Kurt. We can’t just be friends. We’ve experienced too much together to just be platonic. It would just be too much for me to bear.”

“Blaine…”

“I’m sorry Kurt.” Blaine whispered and shook his head. He had been working towards this moment all week … all year really … and Kurt had just broken his heart. He made to leave again because any second the flood gates would open and he would bawl. He couldn’t let Kurt see him cry. Not this time. “Have a safe trip back to New York.” And with that he turned on his heels and hopped briskly down the steps and ran into the building.

+

Burt Hummel had just returned home from dropping his son off at the airport. It was always hard to say good-bye to him but this time it had been almost excruciating. Kurt had been very sad. He seemed lost and even disoriented. Of course, Burt knew why. There were very few things that got Kurt off his game – trouble with Blaine was one of them. Burt played the conversation back in his head and hoped that he had been able to give his son adequate advice.

_“Kurt, what happened with Blaine?”_

_Kurt stopped wheeling his suitcase so that he could turn to his dad. “What makes you think something happened with Blaine?”_

_Burt didn’t respond. He simply stared at Kurt in the knowing way that only Burt Hummel could. Kurt sighed. “He asked me to get back together and I said no.”_

_“Oh.”_

_“Yeah,” Kurt paused. “I want to, dad but… he really hurt me and it’s just going to take a bit longer for me to get over it.”_

_“I understand. Just… don’t make him wait too long, son.”_

_“Dad, it’s not like I’m doing it on purpose. Besides, whose side are you on anyway?”_

_“I’m always on your side, Kurt – that is why I’m telling you not to make him wait too long. If you lose Blaine because you were too scared to take the plunge you will never forgive yourself. I don’t want you to be miserable.”_

_“Well, I may have already lost him for good. He doesn’t even want to be my friend.”_

_Burt sighed and hugged his son. “You two will find each other again. You guys love each other too much for the universe to keep you apart.”_

The doorbell rang, bringing Burt out of his thoughts. He moved to answer the door and found Blaine standing on his front steps with red swollen eyes. “Is he gone?”

“I’m afraid so, son. Come on in.”

Blaine stepped into the house and couldn’t hold in his sobs any longer; he broke down. “I’m sorry. I had nowhere else to go. No one else would really understand.”

“I know buddy,” Burt pulled him into a hug. “I’m glad you came to me. You’re always welcome in this house.” He patted his back softly. “He loves you, you know. He just needs time.”

“I can’t breathe without him in my life. But I can’t breathe with him in my life either – unless it’s all in. He’s my soulmate, Burt.” He sobbed.

“If he’s your soulmate you’ll find each other again.”

“But what if it’s not until we’re old and grey? What if we waste our lives away being miserable before we realize that we love each other and want to spend our lives together?”

“I don’t think that will happen, Blaine. You are both too smart for that.”

Blaine plopped himself down on the couch and pressed his face to his hands. A broken whisper came out of him. “I can’t do this anymore. This year has been horrible without him. I barely survived. The only thing that kept me going was Glee. Now I’m graduating and will be moving away – I’ll be all alone, without my family, friends, and still without Kurt. I won’t survive.”

“You will, Blaine. Where is the strong and confident young man I know? You can do this. Prove to yourself that you can survive without him and sooner than you know it he’ll come to his senses.” Burt squeezed Blaine’s shoulder as he sat beside him. “You can do this, kid. I have faith in you.”

Blaine hung his head and fiddled with his fingers. “I’m not going to NYADA anymore.”

“And why not?”

“Because Kurt is there. If I see him, which I’m sure I will, it will just remind me that he’s not mine – especially if I see him with … someone else.”

“Then where will you go?”

Blaine only answered with a shrug as hot thick tears streamed down his cheeks.


	2. Living Nightmares

8 Months Later

 

Blaine sat near the window. He had been spending a lot of time in this corner of the coffee shop the past three months. It had become his safe place, his own private sanctuary despite the buzzing atmosphere. His trembling hand grasped the paper cup housing his medium drip. He winced when the plastic lid pressed to his cut lip. It was still sore as were his ribs and wrists. Thank goodness it was winter and he was able to wear his cardigans again. They hid a lot. And he had a lot to hide. 

His hazel eyes watched the snowflakes flutter down in the dark night as he let his thoughts take him. Even though he was living a nightmare he was grateful for many things. It was good that everyone he knew lived in a different city – he was alone in Boston – at lease no one he knew from his past was around. No one would see the evidence of the hell he was living – especially not Kurt. He couldn’t handle Kurt seeing him like this – weak and dejected and … broken. He was nothing like the strong and confident Blaine everyone knew back home. 

Blaine didn’t quite know how he had gotten to this moment. He thought he would be able to perceiver Kurt’s rejection after he had made himself apply to The Berklee School of Music to study Music Education and was accepted. He moved to Boston and had adapted quite easily to the city, school, and the workload. Shortly after his freshman year had started he met an amazing man – he had been kind, funny, driven, and incredibly handsome. Blaine thought he would be able to forget his tumultuous past with Kurt and even be able to be his friend again – just friends as Kurt wanted. He had been happy with Tyler, the junior who had quickly become his new boyfriend. 

Blaine took another careful sip of his coffee as he reminisced how wonderful Tyler had been at the beginning of their relationship. He had been very affectionate and kind. He showered Blaine with flowers and home-made dinners. He was genuinely interested in what Blaine had to say and in his dreams for the future. And of course the sex had been fantastic. Quite simply, Blaine had been wooed. If any one of Blaine’s friends had been around to look into the relationship from the outside, they may have suspected that Tyler was grooming Blaine; as it had turned out that’s exactly what he had done. Tyler quickly realised that Blaine was in a weak point in his life. Blaine had been open and up front about his past relationship and his emotions regarding it. Tyler seized the opportunity. 

Blaine had been on cloud nine with Tyler. Yes, he still loved Kurt – he would love Kurt for eternity – but he was able to let go of the dream that he and Kurt would live their lives together. At least that’s what he told himself. Deep down he knew that Tyler was a rebound but he shoved those thoughts to the side and concentrated instead on a future with him. He could see himself settling down with him, moving in together, and eventually getting married. His life wouldn’t be the happily ever after that he had once thought it might be but with Tyler he could have a decent life. A satisfactory life. 

But on Christmas Eve, three months after they had met, Blaine’s world came crashing down again. 

A whispered sob escaped Blaine’s bruised lips as the snowflakes outside became blurry in his field of view. He looked down and let the tears fall then wiped at his face quickly, not wanting the coffee shop patrons to see him cry. Remembering was painful but Blaine couldn’t stop playing that day over and over again in his mind – daily. He couldn’t stop punishing himself because in his mind he deserved to be punished. He hadn’t been good enough for Kurt and it was clear he wasn’t good enough for Tyler either. 

And it was like his thoughts knew – they continued to punish him as they traveled to the forefront of his brain again … He had arrived at Tyler’s apartment as previously planned – though he was half an hour late because he had stopped to buy one final gift for his boyfriend. He made his way through the door and dusted the snow off his jacket as he placed the bag of gifts on the floor. Before he could remove his boots, a hand grabbed him by the lapels of his coat and forced him into the apartment. He suddenly stood in front of an angry and surprisingly drunk Tyler. 

“Why the fuck didn’t you tell me, Blaine?” Tyler shouted. 

A confused look painted Blaine’s face as his eyes searched for any clues, “tell you what?” 

“Don’t play dumb with me.” 

“Ty, I don’t…” The pain was excruciating. His jaw felt like it had been broken. The side of his head hit the floor leaving his temple warm and wet and when he pressed his fingers there they came back red with blood. 

“I told you! Do not play dumb with me!” Tyler yelled as he shook his right hand, trying to free it from pain. 

Blaine didn’t say anything as he tried to sit up and shake the confusion out of his mind. Had Tyler hit him? Tyler? His Tyler? Why? Blaine felt himself being dragged up by his coat again. “When were you going to tell me that you’re a cheating little bitch?” 

“What the hell?” Blaine screamed, making his already throbbing head pound even harder. 

“You cheated on your ex? How long until you cheated on me too?” 

“Tyler, I would…” Again, the pain was excruciating. Another blow landed on Blaine’s face, splitting his lip open as he was thrown into the corner of the wall, his ribs seemingly splitting apart from the force. 

“I’m going out,” Tyler spit out his words. “Get yourself cleaned up because you look like shit. When I get back you better be here and be ready to talk. Unless you want some more.” 

The buzzing emitting from Blaine’s phone brought him out of his thoughts and back to the coffee shop. He checked the texts, knowing exactly who it was from and what it would say: 

 _Sweetness, I’m so sorry. Please come home. I’ll make it up to you._  

Blaine sighed and drank the last sips of his coffee. How many times would he keep going back? Tyler had become a chronic abuser. It was now a weekly occurrence and any little thing would set him off into a tantrum of blinding rage – this morning it was because Blaine had forgot to start the dishwasher and his favourite mug was still dirty. Most times he would _only_ yell and belittle Blaine but it was becoming more common for Tyler to get physical. It was always the same pattern. He would beat the crap out of Blaine, leave in a rage, coax him back with apologies and crying, then pound him into their mattress to “make it up” to him. 

Blaine kept on returning. The truth is he wasn’t ready to leave because he had it set in his mind that no one else would love him. No one could love a cheating, beat up nobody like him – especially Kurt. Tyler was the best he could do. And so, he picked up his phone, wrapped his scarf around his neck, wincing as his bruised ribs stretched then slipped out the door into the cold night, trudging back into the nightmare he now called his life.

+ 

“Santana, just get your fucking hands off of me,” Kurt shrieked. 

“I won’t. I’m getting really tired of dragging your ass home night after night but I will never fail you, Kurt. Now shut up and get in the car.” 

Kurt huffed as he sat down dramatically in Santana’s car. His eyesight blurred and his head spun from the bottle of gin he had consumed. “Why can’t you just let me be? How do you find me every night?” 

“I have a Mexican third eye, remember? Plus, I’m your friend and I know you Hummel. Now buckle up and don’t you dare puke in my car.” 

They drove home in familiar silence. Santana wondered how long she would have to keep doing this. Five nights a week she was out looking after a drunken Kurt and the other two nights she sat with him in their apartment as he cried his heart out to her. It was always the same story – Blaine, Blaine, Blaine. She looked over to where Kurt’s head plastered against her window. “You can call him you know.” 

“We’ve been through this,” Kurt spoke slowly as to not slur his words. He was used to this – he was learning how to act sober even when he was completely intoxicated. “He doesn’t want to be my friend.” 

“No. He doesn’t want to be JUST your friend. It’s been a long time Kurt. Call him. Talk. Maybe things have changed. Or even if you don’t, for fuck’s sake, stop drinking. Do you really think Blaine is going to want to be with you if you’re a drunk?” 

“Fuck off.” 

“I won’t. I’m your friend and I love you.” 

“Besides, I heard he has a boyfriend,” he turned his head to look out the window. 

“You won’t know where you stand unless you talk to him.” Santana parked in front of their apartment building and made to get out of the car. Kurt’s hand grasped her around the wrist. It was only then that she noticed Kurt’s wet eyes. 

“I don’t know how long I can go on like this, Santana. I started drinking to forget the pain but even that’s not working anymore. I just want to drink more and more often. I don’t ever want to be sober because that means I’ll have to face my life. My pathetic lonely Blaine-less life.” 

Santana scooted closer to him. “I’ve never known Kurt Hummel to back down from a challenge. This will be a challenge. It may be the hardest challenge of your life but it will be worth it in the end. We are all worried about you Kurt. Me, your dad, Carol, your friends. We will help you but you need to help yourself too.” 

“I can’t. I’m just too broken.” 

“Let’s go inside. You need to sleep. We can talk more in the morning.” 

The morning came but when Santana peeked into Kurt’s room at 9:30 he was gone. Unfortunately she knew exactly where he had gone. She sighed as she pulled on her coat and slipped out into the cold New York morning and made her way to Central Park where she knew she would find a drunk Kurt on his usual bench with his usual travel mug filled with whiskey. She sat down beside him. A good few minutes of silence passed before Santana spoke. “You’re killing yourself.” 

“Maybe I want to.” 

“You do not.” 

“He broke my heart, Santana.” 

“I know. I don’t excuse him for cheating and I don’t excuse him for not being able to man up and be a friend to you but you need to realise that you’ve also broken his heart by not being able to forgive him and trust him again. It’s Blaine, Kurt. Not just some random guy. It’s Blaine. Your Blaine.” 

Kurt took another sip of whiskey and stared out at the snow. Santana gently took his cup from him and dumped out its contents. “No matter what happens with Blaine – whether you decide to call him or not – I need you to stop doing this to yourself. Please Kurt. It’s killing you and it’s killing me. If for nothing else, just stop because I’m tired of chasing you around all the time.” 

“I never asked for you to take care of me.” 

“Oh, you’re going to play that card? Kurt, if it weren’t for me who knows where you’d be or even if you’d be alive. When was the last time you called your dad? Does he even know you dropped out of school? Does he know you’ve been drinking away your summer money? Does he know that I’ve had to cover rent for the past two months? What’s next Kurt? Are you going to start selling your body so that you can chase the next high?” 

“That doesn’t sound like a bad idea.” Kurt got up and looked down into Santana’s eyes. “You’re a good friend Santana. There’s no arguing that you’ve kept me alive but really, I don’t want to be alive anymore. Not without him. So please, I’m asking you for the last time to just leave me alone.” 

Santana watched him pull his coat tighter around himself and trudge off into the park. Hot tears cooled against her flushed cheeks as she whispered softly, “I will never ever leave you alone, Hummel.”


	3. Rock Bottom

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks everyone for reading. Keep comments coming. :)

Blaine sat at the piano. He scratched out the notes he had just written and tried again. Composition had always come naturally to him but for some reason this assignment was trying, at best. He played a few notes then wrote them on the sheet with his pencil, humming an elusive melody. “Ah fuck,” he said and threw his pencil down in frustration. 

“What’s the matter, sweetness?” Tyler’s voice startled him. 

“Oh. Um, I’m trying to do my composition homework but the melody is just not coming to me.” 

“Maybe I could relieve your frustration,” Tyler’s voice deepened as he sat on the piano bench beside his boyfriend. 

“No, I just need to buckle down and figure this out,” Blaine said dismissively. 

“Blaine…” 

Blaine stopped. He turned to Tyler as he rubbed the back of his neck. “I’m sorry.” His eyes cast downward. “Yes, please relieve my frustration.” 

Tyler smiled and looked into his eyes. “That’s better.” He kissed his lips gently. “You’ll feel better after you blow me. You always do.” He pushed Blaine down onto his knees and released his fly. 

+ 

“Owww” 

Kurt groaned as he opened one eye, then the other. His head pounded like never before – he had had many hangovers but he had never felt like this. His stomach churned, he felt disoriented, light-headed, and like he had carpet in his mouth. He soon realized he was in bed but it was not his. He also realized that he was in an apartment but not his and, he was not alone. He sat up quickly and groaned again at the ache in his head. Whatever residual intoxication lingered was immediately jolted out of his body. The sight around him seemed to sober him up quickly. There was not one, not two, but three naked men passed out in the room – one of which was in bed beside him. He jumped out of bed, ignoring his head, and stifled a scream as he realized that he was naked too. His body was sticky and he had bits of glitter and confetti stuck in every crevasse. He quickly found his clothes and threw them on as his eyes scanned the rest of the strange apartment. He located his wallet, phone, and keys and made his way quietly to the door. 

And then he stopped. 

He whipped around to confirm what he thought he saw. His blue eyes focused on the table in the living room. Upon it he saw short and neat rows of white powder. Instantly he knew what it was. The sight was unmistakable and if he had any doubt, his mind flashed images of the night before - Images of him and three strangers drunk beyond all comprehension, snorting coke and indulging quite intimately in each other. 

Kurt felt sick. He suddenly ran to the kitchen luckily finding the trash can and vomited. After a second and third time, he pressed his forehead to the cool tiled floor and began to sob. What the fuck was he doing to himself? What was he doing to his family and friends? When would enough be enough? He sat back against the fridge. With a trembling hand, he dialed Santana. 

She picked up as she always did. “Where are you Hummel?” 

“I don’t know but please. You have to help me. I’m a fucking wreck.” 

She sighed. Kurt thought it was in disappointment … again. But really it was in relief because somehow she knew that Kurt was hitting rock bottom and he would soon be able to start climbing back up to the top. “You need to help me,” she said gently. “Find out where you are and I’ll come get you.” 

“Okay. Okay.” Kurt lifted to his feet and left the apartment. He found the nearest street-signs and gave Santana the address. 

“Wait for me. I’m coming,” she said as she was already opening the door to her car. 

+ 

Blaine scrubbed and scrubbed at his body. He felt dirty. He always felt dirty after sex with Tyler – although he wasn’t sure that sex was the appropriate word anymore. He performed sexual acts on him but it was never reciprocated and honestly, Blaine didn’t want reciprocation. He wanted to be left alone. He didn’t want physical contact of any kind – not sexual and not violent. But he felt trapped. How would Tyler react if he told him he wanted out? And who would ever want him again? Tears streamed down his cheeks which he hid in the spray of the water. But his sobs were harder to hide. He was miserable. He was living a nightmare but couldn’t tell anybody because he wouldn’t chance Kurt finding out. He would take all the abuse in the world if it meant Kurt would never know. Blaine was ashamed – ashamed of himself and ashamed that he had let another person make him feel this way. The sobs echoed in the steam-filled bathroom. He dropped his face into his hands and cried. 

“Why the hell are you crying?” 

Blaine thought he had locked the door. “I-I’m not.” He lied. 

“Don’t lie to me, Blaine. Is my cock that bad that you cry after sucking it? Or is it because you’re so terrible and sucking it? That must be it.” 

“Please just leave me to shower in peace,” Blaine pleaded softly. 

Tyler opened the glass door. “Leave you to shower in peace? Are you fucking with me right now?” 

“Please Tyler…”

“No, Blaine. You need to be reminded of who is in control here. If I want to be in here while you shower I will be. Why do you think I had a key made?”

Blaine lost composure. “What the fuck, Tyler?” 

Blaine knew. Once those words were out of his mouth he knew he should not have said them. And he was right. His head hit the tiled wall with so much force Blaine saw stars - but only for a split second because after that he fell to the shower floor unconscious while the warm water washed away the blood. 

+ 

Santana opened their apartment door and guided Kurt in and to the bathroom. He was in a daze and she could guess how bad his head was hurting. “Do you need help undressing?” 

“No. I’ll be fine.” 

She turned the shower on and put his towel within reach. 

“Shower and brush your teeth. You’ll feel better.” With that she left to find him a pair of sweats and t-shirt to wear. She also made some toast and had a bottle of water and Advil waiting for him. 

While she waited she texted Burt: 

 _Hey, I think he may have finally seen the light. He’s safe and in the shower now. I’ll keep you posted._  

Burt’s reply was immediate: 

_Thank you, Santana. I owe you my life._

_No you don’t. I love him like a brother. You know that._

_I’m still grateful. You’ve been his rock and my eyes and ears through-out this whole thing._

_I try to get him to call you, Burt. I’m sorry he’s so stubborn._

_It’s ok. As long as I know he has you._

_He’s done showering. I’ll TTYL._  

Kurt fell to the couch beside her. She opened the bottle and made him take the painkillers. “So,” she said. 

“I-I…” words eluded him and he was only able to sob. 

“Shhh. It’s ok. Santana is here and everything is going to be ok. I promise.” 

“I-I… I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” 

“It’s over now.” She whispered and rubbed circles into his back. 

“I did coke, San. COKE,” Kurt blurted. 

Santana’s eyes went wide. “Oh. Wow. Okay. It’s ok,” she hugged him tighter. “You did it once. It was stupid, you won’t do it again.” 

“Oh my god, what if I… I become addicted. What if I go through withdrawls?” Kurt became more and more hysterical. “Santana, oh my god.” 

“Stop it. Just stop it, Kurt ok? I know it’s hard right now but you have to think rationally.” 

He sat back and looked into her eyes. She’s never seen such a broken face before. “Listen to me honey, I don’t know the first thing about cocaine but I’m pretty sure that you won’t become addicted after doing it once especially because I will not let that happen.” 

“Okay,” Kurt breathed deeply. “Okay. I just … I need to figure this out. My life is a complete mess and it’s really overwhelming me right now.” 

“Do you trust me?” 

“Yes, of course I do.” 

“Then you’re going to take my advice, okay?” 

Kurt was silent. He doesn’t know if he’s ready. He knows Santana is all about tough love. He knows he won’t like what she has to say but he also knows that she’s his only chance. He needs her to guide him in the right direction. 

She grasped his hand and continued. “You’re going to go home.” 

“I am home.” 

“No, to your Dad’s.” 

His eyes flickered. “No, Santana. No. I can’t … He can’t. I … just he can’t see me like this. He can’t know. It will break his heart and you know his heart is fragile. Please…” 

“Do you really think he doesn’t know what’s going on?” 

“How would he?” 

Santana didn’t say anything. She simply stared at Kurt until he understood. 

“Oh. Oh god. No. Santana, please tell me you did not tell my Dad.” He stood up quickly wincing at the pain in his head. 

“I had no choice Kurt! He hasn’t heard from you for months. Not even a text. What was I supposed to do when he called me huh? Lie? I’m not that person. There is no way I could lie to Burt Hummel.” 

“Why didn’t you tell me? I can’t believe you would conspire behind my back. Why did you go tattling to my Dad like a fucking schoolgirl?” 

Santana raised an eyebrow and bit her tongue as to not yell. “I tried to Kurt but you were drunk ninety percent of the time. You didn’t care about anything I had to say. And you should be thanking me, Kurt. It’s because of me that he hasn’t come out here to find you drunk or passed out or snorting coke. I’ve been in constant communication with him sugar coating everything you’ve been doing. He knows you’re going through something. He knows you’re struggling and closed off but he has no idea that you’ve been drunk, have no money, and have dropped out of the school you fought so hard to get into. But you know what? You’re going to fucking tell him because I’ve had enough of playing babysitter.” 

“SANTANA, I CAN’T!” 

And with that Santana finally lost it. “YOU CAN AND YOU WILL.” She stood up and pointed at him. “I love you Kurt Hummel. I love you a lot but this is the last straw. Cocaine. You did cocaine. I’m putting my foot down. You’re going home, you’re telling your Dad everything and you’re going to accept all the help you can to get back on your feet. When that is done you’re going to call Blaine and sort this shit out because that is the root of the problem. And if you don’t you can consider us DONE!” 

Kurt seethed at her, his eyes on fire, his teeth gritted but he didn’t yell. His voice was dangerously low and controlled. “Then we… are… done.” And with that he walked out of the apartment to find the nearest bar. 

+ 

Blaine moaned at the pain in his head as he roused awake. “What happened?” 

“Shhh,”came a voice. Tyler’s voice. 

Blaine needed no further explanation. It all came back to him in a flurry as he remembered crying in the shower then the violent blow to his head. He must’ve hit his face as he fell to the floor because he can feel his lips swollen and pain in his eyes – atop the previously existing injuries. In fact, his whole body hurts. He feels like he was run over by a truck and actually he wished he had been. 

“I’m sorry sweetness,” Tyler’s voice again. Then Blaine felt Tyler’s lips kissing his temple and his curls. “I promise it won’t happen again. What do you say I make you your favourite dinner huh? Will that make you feel better?” 

Blaine forced a smile despite the pain along his lips and nodded. “Okay. Yes please.” 

With that he felt the mattress move as Tyler was up and gone into the kitchen. Only then did Blaine open his eyes. He knows he can’t go on like this. This pattern is killing him. Literally. One day Tyler isn’t going to stop and he’s going to end up dead. He knows he has to escape somehow but he sees no options. If he leaves Tyler, he will just find him and drag him home. If he goes to the police everyone will find out. The truth is he doesn’t want to do this. He doesn’t want to leave Boston. He doesn’t want to have to put his studies on hold. He loves Berklee. He loves music. But, he knows if he doesn’t go he will never be happy. He needs to escape and find himself again. He needs to figure out what his future looks like with or without Kurt. 

He has to leave Boston but he really has nowhere to go. His parents are no longer a part of his life – and it dawned on him that maybe that was part of the problem. From when he was a little boy no one in his life has loved him unless they wanted something in return. Not his parents, not his brother, and now not Tyler. 

But Blaine wasn’t kidding himself – he knew there was one person – there had always been one person. Kurt - beautiful Kurt, who Blaine was now too ashamed to even call - because if Kurt rejected him too – really rejected him, then he was scared of what would become of his shattered heart. But he needed an out. If he couldn’t go to Kurt then he had to go to the next best thing. There was another person; a person who, even when things with Kurt were bad, never ever abandoned him. 

He sat up gently and took his phone from the nightstand. He quietly padded to the bathroom and shut the door so that Tyler wouldn’t hear. He began to dial then stopped as he saw his reflection from the corner of his eye. He looked up. His face. His face was the worst it’s ever been. Both of his eyes were black and swollen and his cheekbones display faded yellow bruises. His lip was split in two places and he had a gash by his right temple. Silent tears streamed down his face. This is not Blaine Anderson. This is someone who is lost, broken, and scared. He dialed and when his call was answered he let out one gentle sob. 

“It’s Blaine. I’m in trouble, a lot of trouble. And you’re the only one I can turn to. Please, can I come home?” 

Burt Hummel sighed on the other end. “Of course you can. I told you, this is always your home and you are always welcome. What kind of trouble? Do you need money? Do you need me to pick you up?” 

“I can’t talk now. I’ll text you the details. And yes please. I can’t leave on my own. I just can’t.” 

Burt was deeply troubled. He had spent the last few months worried sick about his son but unable to do anything because he knew that if he tried Kurt would just push him away. And now, Blaine. Blaine who was like a son to him was also in trouble. He of course knew why. He knew why for both of them. The only difference was that Blaine had had the courage to call and ask for help – or maybe he had just hit rock bottom and didn’t have a choice. He trailed up the stairs to tell Carole what was happening and to pack an overnight bag. It looked like he was going to Boston.


	4. Home

Two days later and Blaine is pacing the apartment. He had waited for Tyler to leave for class then quickly packed as many of his belongings as he could into two suitcases and pushed them to the front door. He looked at his reflection in the hall mirror. The bruises around his eyes were still dark but slowly turning purple, the cuts on his lips were scabbing over, and the gash on his temple was no longer bloody but very swollen. Blaine knew that Burt was going to take one look at him and want to hunt Tyler down but that was something he was going to have to chance because the alternative of staying in the situation was no longer an option. He needed out. And he needed out now.

The doorbell rang and after peering through the peep-hole Blaine opened the door to find a worried Burt. His worried face turned to shock and then anger.

“Blaine? What happened to your face? Who did this to you?”

“Burt, it doesn’t matter. I just want to go home…”

“Blaine, who?”

“Please Burt..”

“BLAINE.”

Tears swelled in Blaine’s eyes. “I will tell you everything. Just please. Get me the hell out of here.”

Burt realized that Blaine was just as broken emotionally as he was physically. He put his arm around him and pulled him out into the hall. “Come on then. Let’s go.”

Blaine let out a sigh of relief and grabbed his suitcases. He closed the door without even bothering to lock it then followed Burt out. Once he was belted into the passenger seat of the rental car Burt turned to him. “If my son were to see you like this he would break, Blaine. So you owe it to me to tell me the truth and start from the beginning. You talk. I drive.” And with that Blaine began as Burt pulled out onto the street and toward the airport.

+

Santana tried to keep herself busy. Today she didn’t have work to occupy her mind so she dedicated herself to scouring the whole apartment. Kurt hadn’t been home for two nights and everything in her wanted to go to all the usual spots to drag him back home but she knew that in order for Kurt to truly hit rock bottom, to truly realize what was really happening to him he was going to have to make the next move on his own.

And that is what he did.

Santana didn’t hear the door open behind her; she had her earbuds in blasting the Wicked soundtrack as she vacuumed the cushions of the sofa. Kurt dropped his keys and hung up his coat. He was wearing the same thing he had on when he had left two nights ago. His eyes were red-rimmed and his skin was paler than usual. His hair was mussed in all different directions and he had a thick coat of stubble. This was not the Kurt Hummel anyone was used to. Santana turned and screamed when she saw him standing in the doorway. “Jesus Kurt, you scared me,” she said as she tugged the earbuds out and turned off the vacuum. He didn’t answer and when she really looked at him she saw that he was shattered - more shattered than he had ever been.

“Oh honey,” she said and wrapped her arms around him and hugged him tight. All he could do was let her hold him as he cried and cried and cried some more into her long dark hair. “Shhhh. I’ve got you. It’s in the past now. It’s nothing but up from here, okay?” She leaned back to grab his shoulders and look into his eyes. “Okay?” She said again.

Kurt nodded. “Okay. I just can’t let Blaine see me like this. I decided that I don’t really care who sees me anymore – even my dad but I just can’t let Blaine see me. He’d be devastated.”

“I know honey. That’s why you’re going to go back to Lima and we’ll worry about Blaine only after you’re better.”

“Thank you Santana. I love you.” And again he fell into her embrace and cried.

+

Blaine woke up in the guest room of the Hummel-Hudson home. It was the only home he knew so he felt comfortable there and not having the constant fear of being beat up whenever he turned a corner or said something wrong was a huge weight off his shoulders. But he knew he would have a lot to deal with now. It wouldn’t be an easy fix. He was broken. He would have to claw his way back from the hole he was in until he found the confident and happy Blaine Anderson he knew was hiding within him somewhere. The thing is he didn’t know how to do that – he didn’t know if that Blaine was gone for good and he felt that the only way he’d be able to find him is with Kurt at his side. Kurt, the boy he fell in love with all those years ago. The boy he hadn’t talked to for eight months. He wondered how he was doing in New York. Blaine wouldn’t be the least bit surprised if he was top of his class, had a large circle of friends and already had professional offers being thrown at him. Blaine smiled at the thought.

“Breakfast,” Burt bellowed up the stairs.

Ten minutes later and Blaine was seated at the table with Burt and Carole scooping two pancakes onto his plate. “Thank you Carole. It smells delicious.”

“Oh, it’s my pleasure, honey.” Carole leaned over and patted his hand. “I’m really glad that you called us. It looks like you have been having a really hard time in Boston.” She eyed his face with concern in her gaze.

“Yeah. It really has been a nightmare. I’m sure Burt told you the story.” Blaine looked down, ashamed and proceeded to cut up his pancake. “I-I’m sorry that I’ve brought you into all this but really I have nowhere else to go. And to be honest, I feel safe here. Safer here than anywhere.”

“We know that and we are just glad to help in any way we can,” Burt said. “What do you want us to do? We can do medical stuff, legal stuff, or emotional stuff. If it were up to me I would find that son of a …” he paused as Carole put her hand on his. “It’s not up to me though. You tell us what you need for us to do.”

Blaine chewed quickly, “right now I just want to rest and heal and maybe in the next few days I’ll decide a course of action. I hurt and I need to heal first and foremost – physically and emotionally.”

Burt eyed him cautiously, “are you going to contact Kurt?”

“No.” Blaine set his cutlery down and dabbed his sore lips with the napkin. “But, how is he?”

“I haven’t heard, son.”

Blaine lifted a brow. “Really?”

Burt sighed and got up to pour more coffee, trying to hide the tears in his eyes. “I haven’t heard from him in in eight months.”

“Eight months? Burt? You haven’t called him?”

“Of course I have,” he growled. “Of course I have called my son. But he hasn’t answered and hasn’t returned my calls or texts or emails. I take solace in that Santana is with him and she’s been in contact with me. I guess, well… Blaine, he’s not doing the greatest but I think he’s ok. He just needs time.”

Blaine’s heart lurched painfully. Kurt wasn’t okay. Kurt idolized his dad more than anyone and for him to not call him in eight months? Something was wrong. Something was very wrong. Blaine got up and took his plate to the dishwasher. “I need to get my shit together because as soon as I’m able to I’m going to New York and getting to the bottom of it.”

Both Burt and Carole looked at Blaine and smiled softly as they saw a glimpse of the Blaine they knew and loved.

An hour later, Blaine was alone in the house as both Burt and Carole had gone into work. He made himself comfortable on the couch with a cup of tea and started looked through photo albums of when Kurt was a little boy. His moist eyes gazed at little Kurt setting up tea parties, wearing little bowties, and dancing in a tutu. He shook his head at how silly and adorable he had been … and still was. He was roused from these happy images when he heard the key in the door, imagining that Burt or Carole forgot something. He placed the book aside and wandered into the hall to greet them but what he saw made him stop dead in the doorway. He took a step back as his hazel eyes grew to the size of saucers. Standing before him was the love of his life.

“Kurt…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's a short-ish one but that may be because I need more comments. ;)   
> Ha!


	5. Suitcases

Kurt had prepared himself for a long and difficult conversation with Burt Hummel. He had not prepared to be greeted by the man he was (still) in love with. And what made Kurt stop in his tracks … what made his heart plummet and his stomach rise up into his throat was the sight of this man’s face. “Blaine,” his voice rose slightly higher. “What happened to your face?”

Blaine’s gaze lowered. The shame and embarrassment infiltrated through a deep blush into his bruised face. After eight months, Kurt hadn’t asked him why he was in his house or how he was doing. He had asked him about his face. His ugly beat up face. “Um, I just … got roughed around a bit in my kickboxing class. It’s no big deal.” He lied.

Kurt knew better. He could still read Blaine like a book. He desperately tried to keep his emotions in check as he saw Blaine’s eyes shift and his hand rub the back of his neck. Kurt was devastated at Blaine’s state. “Who, Blaine? Who did that to your beautiful face?”

Blaine winced at the word, _beautiful_. And he heard all the emotion in Kurt’s voice; he didn’t need to look up to see that Kurt’s eyes would be filling with tears. “Don’t worry about it, Kurt, I told you…”

“DON’T LIE TO ME, BLAINE!” Kurt bellowed in sheer grief, desperate to know who in their right mind would do this to such a sweet and gentle man like Blaine.

Blaine’s heartbeat quickened and his breath caught in his throat. _Don’t lie to me, Blaine_. Memories flooded his brain. Bad violent memories of Tyler screaming at him and he knew what would usually happen next; after yelling always came the blows. Blaine panicked. He took a tentative step back then ran up to his room and slammed the door. He crouched down against it and hugged his knees, placing his forehead onto them. He tried his hardest to contain his sobs but trying was futile – the emotion of seeing Kurt, first of all plus the shame he felt when Kurt studied his broken, cowardly face was just too much to bear.

“Blaine?” Kurt’s voice was now more controlled coming from the other side of the door. “I’m sorry I yelled. I’m just really shocked that you’re here and that you’re so … beaten.” He let out a breath. “Please can you open the door?”

Blaine remained silent except for his sobs.

“Blaine, I want to see you. I want to talk. We should talk,” Kurt pleaded.

Blaine’s voice was small and weak. “I don’t want to talk, Kurt. I’m sorry I ruined your visit home. I’ll be out of your house as soon as I book a flight back to Boston.”

“No, Blaine. Stay. Please stay.”

Blaine hugged his knees tighter as his entire body trembled – going back to Boston was not an option but there was no way he would stay here with Kurt. He had too much shame. “No,” he said softly.

“Blaine, please. It’s me. It’s Kurt. You know that I would never hurt you or judge you. I just want to talk with you.” Kurt’s face was wet with tears. All he wanted was to wrap his arms around the broken man on the other side of the door. All he wanted was Blaine. All he needed was Blaine and by the looks of him, it was obvious that Blaine needed him too.

“Kurt, I’m going back. Please just leave me alone.”

Kurt’s eyes flickered in sorrow and frustration. “Fine. Go back to Boston. Be a stubborn child.” He turned and raced down the stairs and slammed the front door.

Blaine jumped as he heard the front door slam. He let himself fall onto his side and lay on the floor. Everything was ruined. He was too much of a coward to talk to Kurt. He didn’t deserve to get better. What he deserved was to go back to Tyler and let him punish him for running away and for thinking that he could find a better life without him. As if on cue, his phone buzzed with a text:

_Sweetness, I miss you. I’m sorry I made you leave. I see that your suitcases are gone and it tears at my heart that I made you run. Please come back to me. I promise I will never lay a hand on you again. Let me make it up to you. Please, Blaine. I love you._

+

Kurt slammed open the door to Scandals. He bee-lined it to the empty bar and ordered a double whiskey while he tried to control his breathing. If he had been in the right frame of mind he would have realized that he was the only patron in there. It was daytime on a Monday after all but the roller-coaster of emotions going through him in that moment made him blind to everything around him. He was angry – angry that Blaine shut him out and wants to run away. He’s also angry at himself for yelling at him but mostly he’s angry at whoever did that to his beautiful face – and to his fragile vulnerable heart. It was clear that Blaine is broken emotionally more than physically. Kurt wants to kill whoever did that to his Blaine. He downed his whiskey in two gulps and ordered another. His mind flooded him with emotions – he was sad – so sad for the state of affairs that he and Blaine have found themselves in. They are apart and because of that they are both miserable. They are both killing themselves in their own respective ways. But mostly Kurt was feeling scared. He was scared for Blaine. If he went back to Boston he would fall into the same trouble that he was trying to escape from. He needed to help him. He needed to convince him to stay away from whoever he ran from. He needed to talk to him and they needed to work it all out because he was not going to let Blaine suffer any more. He himself didn’t want to suffer anymore. But what if Blaine didn’t want him? What if it was too late? What if this was the way their lives would be from now on? Kurt couldn’t bear the guilt, the desperation, the anger, the fear, the sadness. He downed his second double whiskey and ordered a third.

+

Burt arrived home earlier than usual. The garage had been busy but he called a few more guys in to help him this week. He didn’t want to leave Blaine alone all day. He walked in the house and was startled to see a familiar suitcase blocking the hallway. _Oh no_ , Burt thought. “Kurt?”

He moved further into the house. “Kurt, buddy? Are you home?”

“Blaine?”

Burt Hummel is a smart man. He knows that the boys are either lying in bed together or have both gone their separate ways. He climbed the stairs to check the bedrooms – not wanting to see anything that would be embarrassing, he closed his eyes and just used his voice, “boys? If you’re naked put some clothes on because I’m coming up.”

Silence.

“I’m serious. Kurt? Blaine?” He forced himself to look into Kurt’s room. It was untouched – left exactly as he had left it eight months ago. Blaine’s room was next … Burt hanged his head and sighed a deeply worried sigh as he realized what had transpired. Blaine’s room was empty – Blaine was gone along with all his belongings. _Please don’t tell me he went back to Boston_. Burt fished for his phone and dialed Blaine immediately. When voice mail picked up he left a message: “Blaine, buddy, listen to me. I need you to call me. Going back to Boston is not an option. Please let me help you. I know Kurt is back and I’m sure he wants to help you too. I’ll come get you wherever you are, just call me back.”

+

It had been six hours and Burt still had not heard from Blaine. He hadn’t heard from Kurt either despite the three messages he left on his phone. He paced the living room as Carol fixed them tea. Even though it was ten at night she knew that Burt would not be going to sleep for a while – if at all. “Honey, do you want to sit down?”

“No.”

“Pacing isn’t going to bring them home.”

“I can’t just sit here Carol. They’re both in trouble and they’re both so stubborn.”

“Do you want...” Carol’s question was interrupted by a key in the door. Burt ran into the hallway to see a stumbling Kurt shut the door behind him then proceed to fall against the wall.

“What in the hell happened to you? And where have you been?” Any patience that Burt had forced himself to harbour made a swift exit when he saw the state his son was in.

“Scandals,” Kurt said matter of factly. “It’s nice to see you too Dad.”

“Oh, don’t come at me with that. I haven’t seen or heard from you for eight months. The first time I do and you’re falling over drunk? I’m so grateful that your mother isn’t here to see this.”

Kurt’s eyes flared. His Dad had never used his mother against him. Never. “What did you just say?” He made to take a step but decided against it and instead placed his hand on the wall for balance.

Burt did take a step – a stop closer to Kurt. His eyes held his son’s gaze darkly. “I said, I’m grateful…”

“I KNOW WHAT YOU SAID!” Kurt’s eyes filled with tears as he screamed at his father, the man who had raised him on his own since the age of eight.

“Listen kid,” Burt moved even closer to him. He also had tears in his eyes and his heart was ripping in two but this was something he had to say. “You do not ignore me for eight months, show up drunk, and then yell at me in MY home. Is that clear?”

“Oh, that’s very clear,” Kurt slurred. “Very fucking clear.” He placed his hand on his suitcase and turned to walk out the door. “Coming here was a mistake. I’ll be in New York.”

Burt grabbed Kurt’s wrist and before Kurt even knew what was happening Burt had him draped over his shoulder and was carrying him up the stairs. Burt ignored Kurt’s shrieks and attempts to get free. He continued his lecture as only Burt Hummel could. “You think you are above your old man? You think you can waltz in and out of my life without giving a crap about how I’m feeling? You think you have the right to treat yourself the way you are? Think again, kiddo. You are now under my watch and I’m not letting you ruin your life because you’re a stubborn jackass.” He threw him down on the bed and kneeled down grabbing Kurt’s wrists tightly but not hurting him. The tears that had collected in his eyes now flowed freely down his cheeks, matching the ones on his son’s face. “It’s always been you and me, Kurt. We have always made it work. We have always held each other up when the other was weak. This is no different. Please don’t go. Please let me help you.”

Kurt’s eyes were wet and wide as they stared down at his Dad. His head was fuzzy but his heart understood exactly what his Dad was saying. And that is when Kurt Hummel broke down and started fighting his way up instead of down.

+

Carol had settled down from the intense scene she had just witnessed between her husband and step-son. She sipped her tea when she heard a knock at the door. She knew immediately who it was so she jumped up and opened it and was met with a trembling and hysterical Blaine. “I…I’m sorry.” He stammered. “Please, can I come in?”

“Of course honey, come on.” She grabbed his arm and led him and his suitcase into the hallway. He dropped it right beside Kurt’s as Carol took him into the living room.

“Where’s Burt?” he whispered. He wasn’t sure he wanted to know because he knew he’d be angry at him.

“He’s with Kurt. He’s not doing so well honey.”

“It’s my fault. It’s all my fault,” he placed his face in his hands. “I made him angry. I made him leave.”

“No. You listen to me.” Carol soothed a hand over his back. “He is hurting right now and has been for a long time but you are also hurting. The four of us need to get on the same page, okay? Burt and I only want for you and Kurt to find yourselves again. If that means together great but if not that’s ok too. We are here to support you and help you.”

Blaine shook his head, “but I just can’t face him, Carole. I’m ashamed. I’m supposed to be strong for him.”

“Kurt would be the last person on earth who would ever judge you, Blaine. In your heart you know that. And you know what? Vulnerability _is_ strength.”

Blaine could only press into her hugging arms and let his tears spill down his cheeks. “I almost went back to Boston,” he whispered. “I booked a flight and I was waiting at the gate but when they called us all to board I froze.” He took a deep breath. “I couldn’t go back to him, Carole. I can’t. He’ll kill me.”

“That’s why you’re staying here with us, with your family.”

“I love you guys, the three of you,” Blaine squeezed his eyes shut thinking about all the good memories he has made with Kurt and his family. He desperately wanted that again.

“We love you too, honey. And things will work out.” Carole wanted to promise but she never in her life had broken a promise so for the time being she decided to just leave it at that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading. Please review :)


	6. Hashing It Out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! Thanks so much for reading. I appreciate all the comments, keep em coming. :)

Blaine wakes the next morning in his bed with thoughts of the night before. _Thank God for Carole_. She had sat with him for quite a while holding him and soothing him before he said good night and climbed into bed. He had been incredibly tired but mainly he wanted to be tucked away safely in his room so that he didn’t run into Kurt again. He knew he would have to see him eventually – probably even this morning – but he didn’t have it in him to see him last night.

If Blaine is being honest, he’s terrified - terrified to get out of bed and head downstairs because he knows Kurt will be there. He knows that they will have to talk and that Kurt will be staring at his broken face. Thank goodness he won’t be able to see the scattered black bruising along his ribcage. Another part of him is excited. It is Kurt, after all – the man he loves beyond all measure. He’s never for a second stopped loving him. Blaine knows that he will love him forever. But he’s scared and worried and ashamed.

+

Kurt’s head hurts, though, he will gladly take the pain of a hundred hangovers than what he’s feeling in his heart at the moment. He’s terrified. He’s terrified for Blaine and for the state of their relationship; not that they even have a relationship - but what happened yesterday frightened him. He had yelled at Blaine and Blaine had been scared of him. How could Blaine be so fragile? What had happened … who had happened … to Blaine to make him scared of him? The truth is he didn’t want to leave his bed. He didn’t want to have to face Blaine and those heart-broken yet beautiful hazel eyes. Blaine’s eyes. Kurt’s heart lurched as he thought about how utterly in love he still was. He would love Blaine forever – even if Blaine pushed him away again – his love for this man would never ever fade.

+

Burt and Carole sat at their kitchen table eating their toast and drinking their coffee. After Kurt and Blaine had gone to bed last night they had filled each other in on what was going on with the two of them. Kurt had told his Dad everything – about the drinking, the money situation, and how he had to drop out of NYADA. Burt had been surprised. He knew Kurt was going through something but he never imagined that he would have dropped out of school. And the drinking, Kurt had rarely consumed any type of alcohol even at the height of his teenage years when all his friends were enthralled with it. Burt fell asleep huddled into Carole like a child. His heart was heavy for his son and for Blaine. He knew that in order to fix the mess Kurt and Blaine were going to have to talk – really talk. They were both going to have to let down their walls and join together the way only Kurt and Blaine can. But Burt also knew that was easier said than done.

“More coffee, honey?”

“Yeah, I need it today, thanks.” Burt pushed his mug so that Carole could refill it. “And thank you also, by the way, thank you for keeping me sane last night. I was a wreck.”

Carole patted his hand. “You’re welcome honey. That’s what I’m here for. They’ll come around, don’t worry. It’ll be awkward but those two will be okay.”

And awkward it was.

Kurt arrived first. He greeted Carole with a hug and a kiss to her cheek then hugged his Dad tight, murmuring “I love you,” against the collar of his plaid shirt. He helped himself to coffee then sat down with his parents to wait for the inevitable.

“Can I make you some eggs, honey?” Carole stood from the table with her empty plate.

“No, no. I’ll be fine. You guys have to work. I can fend for myself.”

Burt eyed him.

“I can.” He protested. “I really can.”

“I know you can, son but you haven’t been. Let Carole make you some eggs then we’ll be on our way.”

“Okay, but I’m making dinner.” He went to take a sip of his coffee but stopped with the mug part way up to his lips as his eyes fell on Blaine who was standing hesitantly in the kitchen’s entrance.

Carole broke the silence. “Would you like some eggs too, Blaine?”

Blaine tore his gaze from Kurt and forced himself to move into the kitchen and towards Carole. “That would be nice, thank you.” He kissed her cheek and hugged Burt. Burt clung to him for a moment while he whispered in his ear. “Thank you for coming back last night.” Blaine nodded and poured himself coffee before sitting at the table. He sat as far away from Kurt as he could but then looked up into Kurt’s still gazing eyes. “Good morning,” he mumbled.

Kurt sipped his coffee because he needed to do something with his hands. “Good morning.”

The air was thick. The tension was high. Aside from the good mornings, Kurt and Blaine hadn’t said anything to each other. They both poked at their eggs and toast and sipped coffee like it would be the last drink of their lives. Burt and Carole probed them both with polite conversation until Burt couldn’t take it any longer. He stood up and placed his hands on the back of his chair and stared at the both of them. “Okay you two. I can’t force you to be friends. I can’t force you to be more than friends. But if you want to continue staying in my house and eating around my table I will force you to talk. Hash out whatever it is that you two need to say to each other so that we can maybe have a less stressful meal this evening. Now I’m going to work.” He joined Carole in the hall to gather their things for their respective work days. He gave one final look into the kitchen and pointed at them. “And by hashing it out I do not mean rip each other’s clothes off and fall into bed the second we’re out the door.”

A simultaneous “Daaadddd!!” and “Buuurrrttt!!” chimed out of the kitchen as Burt grinned smugly and opened the front door. “Love you both,” Carole called out and let the door close behind her.

+

Blaine was terrified.

Kurt was terrified.

Blaine rose quickly from the table, gathered both their dishes and moved to the dishwasher. His voice was soft as he loaded the dishes in. “Look, I don’t want to deal with a disappointed and angry Burt Hummel tonight so why don’t we ummm… just talk about it. At least then we can tell him that we tried.”

Kurt stood up and turned towards Blaine who still had his back to him. “Is that the only reason you want to talk to me? So that my Dad won’t be disappointed in you?” His voice was gentle.

Blaine dried his hands on the tea towel as he looked down. He took a deep breath and turned to face Kurt - beautiful Kurt who still had the ability to make him stop in his tracks. Kurt - who was so stunning that it made his heart ache with want. Kurt – who was staring at him with those clear cobalt eyes. “No. That’s not the reason at all, actually.”

“Then what _is_ the reason?” Kurt couldn’t take his eyes off of him because even in his current state – all bruised and cut up – Blaine was beautiful. And Blaine was perfect for him. He had always been and would always be.

For Blaine, this was a moment. It had to be all or nothing. He couldn’t afford to beat around the bush anymore. He simply had to be honest and forthcoming with Kurt. That would be the only way Kurt would truly respond. “The reason is that you need me and I need you. But that’s not all,” he hesitated. “I love you – I never stopped. And I know that you love me.” He turned around suddenly to finish with the dishes. He couldn’t bear to look at Kurt when the inevitable happened – when Kurt would tell him that in fact no, he didn’t need him and he didn’t love him. Not anymore.

He wasn’t prepared to feel Kurt’s unyielding arms circle his torso and hug him from behind. He wasn’t prepared to feel the strength and warmth of Kurt’s chest to his back. He wasn’t prepared for Kurt’s voice just inches from his ear whispering, “I need you now like I’ve never needed you before. And I love you more now than I ever have.”

Tears filled Blaine’s eyes.

Kurt continued his whisperings, “Blaine Anderson, please come talk with me. I have so much to say to you and I want to hear everything you have to say to me. Please.”

Blaine could only nod as tears slid down his cheeks. “Come on then.” He turned and grasped Kurt’s hand and was led out to the living room.

“So who should go first?” Kurt asked quietly once he and Blaine were situated on the couch facing each other. Blaine leaned back against the arm of the couch with his legs crossed in front of him. His hazel orbs lucid and round as he gazed into Kurt. “Um, maybe you could go first? I’m quite nervous.”

Kurt leaned forward, placed his elbows to his knees and met Blaine’s eyes. “I’m nervous too but okay, I’ll go first.” He motioned to grasp Blaine’s hand but thought better of it. “Blaine, it’s just you and me. Let’s stop being stubborn and nervous and elusive. We know so much about each other and in the past have been so comfortable with each other, there’s no reason we can’t be that now.” He took a deep breath and watched Blaine smile.

“You’re right. Okay. It’s just you and me. Kurt and Blaine. I’m ready.” Blaine said with a nod as he relaxed a little.

Kurt played gently with the fuzz on his skinny jeans, thinking about how he wanted to start. “Blaine … I’m really concerned about you.”

“Wait, I thought you were going to go first.”

“I am going first and my first concern is you. I’m angry and scared for you, Blaine. I want to know who did this to you and why you’ve let them.”

Blaine looked down and let out a nervous laugh. “Okay. Then I’ll go first.” He began the story with when he applied to Berklee and his move to Boston. It was easy for him to talk about those things because they were positives. When he got to talking about Tyler though, he hesitated and Kurt did finally place his hand over his and urged him to continue. “It’s just me. I won’t judge you.” And that was enough for Blaine to go on. “Kurt, I met someone.” He breathed out. “At the time I didn’t know it but now I know that it was just a rebound. I mean, yes I was into him but I was never ever into him like I am into you. How could I be? No one compares to you, Kurt. But I tried. I tried to make a go of it because being without you was so painful.” He lowered his gaze before continuing, “but I guess I wasn’t good enough. I didn’t try hard enough because it all went downhill very, very quickly.”

Kurt put his hand up. “I need to stop you right there.”

Blaine lifted a brow.

“I’m sorry but I need for you to know that this is not your fault. You _are_ good enough. You have always been good enough Blaine – at least for me you have.”

Blaine tilted his head ever so slightly and blushed. “Kurt…”

“I know. I’m sorry…”

“No.” Blaine squeezed Kurt’s hand. “You don’t know how much I needed for you to say those words.” He blinked back tears. “I’ve felt so ashamed and so depressed for so long because I thought I wasn’t good enough and that you deserved better…”

“No, no, no,” Kurt whispered and placed his palm instinctively on Blaine’s cheek. Blaine had the courage to continue, “I guess that is what made me get trapped in this hideous relationship – my own self-loathing and lack of confidence. Tyler turned violent. I don’t know - he was like Jekyll and Hyde. One minute he was sweet and attentive the next he was punching my face and throwing me against walls.” He paused as he noticed that Kurt had become visibly upset. His arms trembled as he tried to hold Blaine’s hands with both of his. His breath quickened and his eyes turned dark and dangerous. “That son of a bitch.”

“No, Kurt. I’m okay now. Your dad came to Boston to get me and I’m never going back.”

“He hurt you, Blaine. He physically and emotionally wrecked you and I… I …” Kurt’s inevitable sobs came forcefully. “I was too busy getting drunk to even know about it or to protect you.” Kurt cried. He doubled over on himself and cried hard into his hands. Blaine had to scoot forward and rub circles on his back to try to calm him somewhat. “Shh. I’m okay now. I’m here with you and I’m never leaving again.”

“I’m so sorry Blaine. I’m so sorry that I never took you back when you asked me. I’m sorry I ignored you for eight months. I’m just … so fucking sorry, Blaine, so sorry.”

Blaine bent forward and placed a soft kiss into Kurt’s hair. “You don’t need to apologize,” he paused. “But I forgive you.” After a few moments of Blaine rubbing Kurt’s back he spoke again, gently. “It’s your turn. I’m worried about you too you know.”

Kurt nodded and moved closer to Blaine. He let him hold him. Only when his back was pressed to Blaine’s chest with Blaine’s arms wrapped around him was he able to begin his side of the story. Blaine was quiet as he listened to Kurt talk. He learned about the drinking, the money, NYADA … everything hurt. His heart lurched in pain as Kurt told him about all the times Santana had to drag him back home.

“But through it all,” Kurt said. “I just wanted you. Only you. I didn’t want to face my life without you and the only way to seemingly make it better was to drown myself in alcohol. It’s become a coping mechanism. Any time something goes even a little bit askew I run to the nearest bar. I need help Blaine. This isn’t going to go away overnight. I … I … “ He took a deep breath and clutched Blaine’s hand against his chest, “I’m an alcoholic,” he finished.

Blaine squeezed his arms tighter around Kurt as he felt his body shake from sobbing. “I’m so sorry Kurt. I’m sorry I was too selfish to be a friend to you. You needed me and I wasn’t there.” It was his turn to cry. He placed his cheek against the top of Kurt’s head and let the tears flow. “We’ll get you better, Kurt. I promise. I swear. If it’s the last thing I do we are going to fix this - you, me, us.” He placed a kiss to Kurt’s temple and closed his eyes. Things were far from perfect but for the first time Blaine felt a little bit like his old self. He knew that he belonged here, with Kurt. And he knew that he would do everything in his power to make it right again.

That was it. That was the moment Kurt and Blaine pushed through the ugly stuff and were able to start with a clean slate. It was only up from there and they both dared to hope that they would make it. They dared to dream that they would become good friends again … and more.

As Kurt was telling Blaine that he felt stronger and felt like they could turn their relationship around, the kitchen table softly vibrated from Blaine’s buzzing phone. A new text message from Tyler:

_I waited for you but you never came so now you’ve made me angry. I’m going to find you and when I do you’ll be coming home with me. And you’ll end up in a world of hurt, I promise you._


	7. A Second First

The next morning both Kurt and Blaine woke up in their own respective beds. They had had a great evening as they had continued to talk about their feelings and what actions they would take to move forward. They had cooked dinner together and sat down with Burt and Carole to a more relaxed and fun meal. They both knew that they were on their way to becoming best friends again and probably more but they also knew that falling into bed with each other would put more stress on their relationship in the long run – although there was no denying the sexual tension between them – it was Kurt and Blaine, after all. But, they wanted to protect what they had. They wanted to take it slow. They wanted to give each other the time and space to breathe and heal. They were being smart. So, Kurt was happy. He spent the morning showering and dressing before skipping down to breakfast with his family.

“Good morning, kiddo,” Burt hugged him and ruffled his perfectly coiffed hair.

“Dad!”

Burt chuckled as he poured coffee. “What’s up today?”

“Well,” Kurt kissed Carole’s cheek and sat at the table. “I’m actually going to look into joining an AA group.”

Burt turned. “Really? Wow.”

“Why are you surprised, Dad? I told you how I’ve spent the last six months.”

“Yeah but knowing you I thought I’d have to convince you to go. I know how stubborn you can be.”

“Thanks Dad,” Kurt groaned.

“Oh, you know what I mean. I thought it would be more of a struggle to get you to go but I’m very happy you’ve come to this decision.”

“It was easy, actually.” Kurt took a sip of coffee. “I have so much more to lose now. Blaine and I talked and … well, we want to make a go of it again. I can’t do that if I’m drunk, Dad. I can’t be a good man for him if I’m so weak that any little problem will make me run to the nearest bar.”

“Oh, honey,” Carole cut in. “I’m so proud of you. And I hope that you’re doing it as much for yourself as you are for Blaine.”

Kurt smiled a happy smile. “Thank you. I know it’ll be a long road but I’m determined to make this work, Carole, for me and for Blaine.”

Burt squeezed his son’s shoulder. “Anything you need, I’m here.”

“I know. I’ve always known that. I’ve just been too stupid to ask for help. But I’m here now.”

“Yeah, you are,” Burt hugged him and ruffled his hair again.

Meanwhile upstairs Blaine sat frozen on his bed. He had showered and dressed but didn’t want to go downstairs quite yet. He was troubled and afraid and he didn’t want Kurt to see it written all over his face. “Just ignore it,” he whispered to himself. “They’re empty threats. He doesn’t know where you are.” His phone buzzed for the tenth time this morning. He desperately didn’t want to read it but he just couldn’t ignore it either:

_You know I’ll find you, Blaine. I found out about your cheating ass and I’ll find out where you are too. It’s just a matter of time before you’re my bitch again._

Blaine felt sick. He had to keep his mind busy otherwise he’d go crazy with worry. He threw his phone under his pillow and headed downstairs to have breakfast with his family.

“Hey you,” Kurt smiled happily at the sight of Blaine.

“Good morning,” he leaned down to hug Kurt and lingered a while before he searched for coffee. “Where are Burt and Carole?”

“They went to work. You’re late. Did you sleep okay?”

“Ah, yeah. Like a baby,” Blaine lied and forced a smile.

“Then why do you look like you’ve just seen a ghost?”

“What? No. I’m fine.”

“Blaine Anderson…”

Blaine scooted closer and took Kurt’s hand. He needed to diffuse Kurt’s suspicion. “I’m fine, really. I just … am a little nervous … because … well, I was wondering if you’d let me take you out tonight.”

Kurt raised a brow. “Out?”

“Yes.”

“Like, on a date?”

Blaine laughed at Kurt’s adorableness. “If you wish for it to be a date then it will be a date.”

Kurt gave him a sly look which turned into the cutest smile Blaine had seen. “Okay. Yes!”

“Yes?” Blaine asked happily and kissed Kurt’s cheek. “I have the most perfect evening planned.”

“Wow, it sounds like you’ve been giving this some thought.”

“Of course.”

And he had. He had been thinking about their first date (for the second time) ever since that phone call so long ago on Thanksgiving – when Kurt decided that he still wanted to have Blaine in his life in some capacity. Blaine always wished that they would reunite so yes, he had been thinking about it for a very long time. And to be honest, it had become his escape. When his life turned into a nightmare – when he needed to forget about the yelling and the beatings - his mind retreated to Kurt and to what their second first date would be like … would feel like.

“Okay,” Kurt brought him out of his thoughts. “But will you go someplace with me first?

“I’ll go anywhere with you.”

A smile. “Well, it’s not romantic,” Kurt laughed. “I want to check out this AA group and I’m a little scared to go alone.”

Blaine grabbed his hand. “Say no more. We’ll go together,” Blaine gave him an encouraging smile. “I’ll be right beside you.”

Upstairs another text lit up the underside of Blaine’s pillow:

_Lima, Ohio huh?_

+

After they arrived back home from the AA meeting, Blaine wandered upstairs for a nap. He really hadn’t slept well the night before and he wanted to be refreshed for their date that evening. So after he was sure that Kurt was okay with all that transpired at the meeting he crawled into bed and drifted off fairly quickly.

Kurt, on the other hand, was not anywhere near sleepy. He was too worried about what he would wear that evening. Blaine had told him casual but how casual could he be on a first date? He looked through the limited wardrobe he had brought with him and grumbled. He finally decided on navy skinny jeans and a simple grey t-shirt with a white vest. That’s as casual as Kurt Hummel was going to get. He sat on his bed and decided to call Santana.

“How are you, Hummel” she answered.

“Hey you. I’m good. Really good.”

“Wow, you sound … sober, so that’s a start,” she said earnestly.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right. I actually went to my first AA meeting today and it went well. I didn’t really say much I just mostly observed and listened to other people’s stories. It was an eye opener for sure.”

“I’m so proud of you Kurt. I wish you could see my smile right now.”

“Thank you. I mean, really thank you, San. You are an amazing friend. I wouldn’t be here without you.”

“Oh hush. You would do the same for me. How are things with Blaine? Last time we talked you said he was staying with your dad. What’s that about?”

“Oh my god, Santana,” Kurt squeaked. “He’s taking me out on a date tonight.”

“Whoa. Whoa. That’s kinda fast?”

“It is. But it feels so right. He makes me so happy.” Kurt was almost bouncing on his bed.

“You do sound happy. I’m glad you were able to see him and talk to him. But why is he there? I thought he lived in Boston?”

“Yeah. Well, he’s been going through some things. Um, things with his now ex-boyfriend took a bad turn and he needed to get away.” Kurt really didn’t want to get into the specifics. Santana was his best friend but this was Blaine’s story to tell, not his.

“Everything has sort of worked out then, I guess,” Santana said. “And as happy as I am for you I do miss your crazy ass, Kurt.”

He laughed. “I miss you too but we will be together soon enough, I know it.”

“I can’t wait.”

“Okay, I’m going to go. I need to shower and get ready for the date.”

“Oh, Hummel, just … please … be careful with that heart of yours. I know he’s adorable but falling into bed with him so soon will not help the situation.”

“Santana, what do you take me for? A floozy?”

“Absolutely.”

“I love you too, San,” Kurt laughed and hung up.

+

Blaine was adamant on picking Kurt up so he knocked on his bedroom door at seven sharp for their date. When Kurt opened the door Blaine almost fell backwards. He. Was. Beautiful. Kurt’s jeans were insanely tight, even for Kurt Hummel standards and his hair was coiffed in a gentle upward swoop to perfection. But his eyes … those beautiful and clear blue eyes that Blaine had fallen for all those years ago seemed to burn into Blaine’s soul. “Hey,” he breathed. “You look amazing, Kurt,” He held his hand out. “Are you ready?”

Kurt couldn’t speak. He could only nod his affirmation because Blaine looked gorgeous in his burgundy jeans, showing off his ankles of course, his black polo shirt with the top buttons undone, and the grey cardigan that was vintage Blaine Anderson. He had just a small amount of gel in his hair so his curls showed beautifully. And his eyes … those enchanting honey-laced eyes that Kurt could never quite forget.

“Shall we then?” Blaine smiled and offered his arm so that Kurt could link into it.

Blaine drove but it was hard for him to keep his eyes entirely on the road with Kurt sitting beside him. He kept stealing glances his way hoping that he wasn’t being too obvious but he just couldn’t help it. “Kurt, I need to tell you that you look stunning tonight.”

Kurt blushed as he looked out the window, trying to guess where they were going. “Oh, thank you Blaine. I thought the same of you. You’re very handsome tonight. Well, always really.”

Blaine pressed his lips together and watched the road. He didn’t think himself handsome – particularly not lately. “Kurt, I’m not handsome. My face is still bruised and cut.”

“Oh stop. I don’t care about that. I mean, I do care that you’ve been hurt but you have always been and will always be handsome to me Blaine – even if your face falls off. Your beauty radiates from your heart.”

Blaine wanted to kiss him. How was this happening to him? Last week he was being thrown into the tiled shower wall and now he was being wooed by the most gorgeous man to ever walk the earth. “Thank you,” he said softly. “I don’t know what I’ve done to deserve this second chance with you Kurt but I want you to know that I’m not going to screw it up this time. I promise.”

Kurt smiled at him and slid his hand over Blaine’s thigh. “I somehow know that. It just feels different this time. Feels good.”

Blaine drove the car into Westerville. He made a pit stop to pick up Chinese food from their old usual place then headed to Dalton Academy.

“Dalton, Blaine?”

“Yup, I pulled some strings. It’s beneficial to be a Warbler legend,” he winked and Kurt rolled his eyes.

“I know, I know, the legend with the voice of an angel who oozes sex appeal. How did Sebastian put it? Oh yes, sex on a stick. That’s you Blaine Warbler.”

“Do I sense some jealousy,” Blaine teased as he led Kurt into the familiar common room.

“Not jealous because I know that I will be the only one who will keep this legend’s attention for the rest of our lives.”

Blaine stopped as he set the bags down. “Kurt…”

“I’m sorry, was that too much?”

“No. It was perfect. And hot.” There was no holding back. He leaned forward and grasped Kurt’s face gently, pulling him in, closing the space between them as he kissed his lips. Blaine swooned into it as he pressed his tongue against Kurt’s mouth, asking for permission. And Kurt granted it. They kissed slowly but deeply for what seemed like hours. Soft moans filled the room before Blaine broke the kiss and blushed. “Umm, that was…”

“Yeah. More please,” Kurt breathed.

Blaine kissed him again. And again until he remembered that they were in a high school and their food was getting cold. “I promise you there’s more where that came from but we should eat.”

Kurt bit his lip. “I presume you mean food, right?”

“Kuuurt!”

Kurt laughed and started to take out their dinner while Blaine lit the fireplace. “So, I called in and talked to the head of the Warblers. I don’t really know him but he knows who I am which is fantastic because he assured me that no one would disturb us in here tonight.”

“Wow, you really do have pull.”

“I told you. I’m a legend here.”

They sat on the familiar leather couch each with their box of food and chopsticks. The fire added to the romantic ambiance as did the falling snowflakes beyond the tall windows. Blaine pinched a broccoli between his chopsticks and offered it up to Kurt’s mouth. “We made so many memories in here.”

Kurt chewed. “Yeah, such lovely ones.”

“I want to make more memories with you, Kurt. Here, everywhere, and anywhere. I was stupid to not fight for you. I’ve wasted so much time on feeling sorry for myself and getting into that nightmare relationship. I don’t want to waste any more time.”

Kurt fed Blaine a water chestnut. “Nor do I, but Blaine I thought we said we were going to take it slow.”

“I’m all for that. We will take it slow but I just wanted to be up front with my feelings,” he paused so that Kurt would look into his eyes. “I want you. I need you. Forever. And I’m not going to walk away this time. You’re it for me.”

Kurt put his box down because his hands were shaking so badly and he didn’t want to drop his food. He took Blaine’s box from his hands and placed it on the table beside his. “Blaine,” his fingers trailing slightly over Blaine’s thigh, “You’re it for me too. You’ve always been it – it just took a little while to get here.” His eyes softened as he looked into Blaine. “I love you. I love you so much.”

This time the kiss was more urgent. It was filled with passion and love. Their mouths latched onto each other and Kurt pressed Blaine back to lie onto the couch. Blaine’s eyelids, cheeks, nose, lips, jawline, and throat were thoroughly explored.

“Kurt, we should…” _God, that feels so good_ , Blaine thought.

Kurt was busy kissing him…

“Kurt. We’re in a high school,” Blaine moaned.

Kurt’s hand slid under and up Blaine’s shirt, his fingertips caressing that toned flesh he loved so much.

“Kurt, please honey. Stop.”

Kurt stopped. “Oh. I’m sorry.” He lifted off and stood up to fix his ruffled hair, using the window as a mirror.

Blaine was quick to hug him from behind. “No, no. It’s not that I don’t want it … because oh my God I do. I want you so bad.” He pressed his face to Kurt’s shoulder, “But I just don’t want to get carried away here. I know no one will bother us but it’s still a public place. Come home with me.”

Now that he was a bit more under control Kurt was able to form coherent thoughts. He was hesitant. Santana was right. Falling into bed with Blaine so soon wouldn’t do either of them any good. “I don’t know if that’s a good idea.”

“What?”

“I mean, I want to too but it may be too soon. Let’s take it slow like we agreed. I think it will strengthen our bond.” Kurt turned in Blaine’s embrace and placed his hands on his shoulders, squeezing.

“But you were just all over me, Kurt. And now you’re telling me no?”

“Blaine…listen to me. I was all over you because I love you and I want you. That is also the reason that we should wait.”

Blaine sighed. “You’re right. I know. I just … I love you and want to share everything with you.”

“I know honey. And we will. Just give it time.” Kurt held out his hand and Blaine took it. “Come on. Let’s finish eating so that we can put that piano to good use. We haven’t sung a duet in far too long.”

Blaine smiled and followed.

+

Just like he was adamant on picking Kurt up, Blaine was adamant on walking him to his door too. They trailed up the stairs of the Hummel-Hudson home, giddy with happiness. “Shh,” Kurt whispered. “Burt Hummel will not be happy if we wake him up.” Blaine pressed his hands to Kurt’s hips and followed him up the stairs and to his bedroom door. Blaine stood there, his eyes shining as he gazed at his date. “I had such a good time. I’m glad we did this.”

Kurt grasped his hand. “I don’t want it to end.” He thought back to the duet they sang and how beautifully their voices still harmonized. And that dance – it felt so good to be in Blaine’s embrace again, swaying to the music. He could have burrowed into Blaine’s chest and remained there forever. “Stay with me, tonight,” he breathed, eyes searching for Blaine’s response.

“Kurt…”

“Please, Blaine. I just want to hold you. I want to sleep with you in my arms.”

There could have been a hurricane happening in Kurt’s room and Blaine would have still agreed. “Yes. I would like that very much.”

Kurt took his hand and led him into his room, closing the door behind him. He stood there for a moment before he slid his arms around Blaine’s torso, simply hugging him, enjoying his warmth and comfort. “There is no better feeling in the world than being close to you, Blaine.”

Blaine wasn’t sure if he would be able to resist. How was he supposed to lay with Kurt in his bed … in such close proximity and not make love to him. He was deeply _in_ love him, after all – he was the one. He took in a deep breath. “I love you. I love you so much.” He smiled into Kurt’s blues and pressed a kiss to his jaw, trailing along the bone and to his ear. “And I want you so much.”

Kurt seemed to purr from Blaine’s affections. His hand slid down Blaine’s arm to grasp his hand. “I want you too. Every cell in my body is screaming at me to take you, to love you … but Blaine, we should sleep. Just sleeping with you has always been one of my favourite things.”

Blaine nodded. He knew Kurt was right but that didn’t help the intense need cultivating in his soul … and in his pants. But he had vowed to himself earlier in the week that he would not screw this up. Not this time. He took Kurt’s hand and led him to the bed and slowly started to remove his many layers. “You’re right. Let’s sleep. Let’s hold each other and sleep.”

Kurt smiled and placed sweet kisses all along Blaine’s cheeks and throat as they undressed each other. Once they were down to their boxer briefs, Kurt threw back the covers, got in and held them open for Blaine to slide in beside him. Blaine turned the bedside lamp off; they were in total darkness except for the moonlight filtering in through the window. They moved swiftly and seamlessly – their bodies remembered, their hearts knew… they lay together, forehead to forehead, nose to nose, hands clutched tightly at their hearts. “I love you,” Kurt murmured as his eyes fluttered closed and he felt Blaine’s lips on his.

“And I you, sweetheart. Always.”

That is how Kurt and Blaine drifted off to sleep. They were huddled together in deep slumber when Blaine’s phone buzzed in the back pocket of his discarded jeans – incoming texts from Tyler:

_Never underestimate me. You’re mine._

_I’ll see you soon, sweetness._

_Very soon, indeed_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks everyone for reading. Thoughts? :)


	8. Two Steps Back

Soft morning sunlight filtered into Kurt’s room. Kurt’s eyes fluttered open; he smiled as he felt Blaine’s weight resting against his chest. He peered down and had to stifle a purr. Blaine looked adorable. His long eyelashes kissed his cheekbones as he drew soft breath in and out. His curls were a mess atop his head, his toned arm was thrown across Kurt’s chest and Kurt could feel a bit of drool pooling against his abdomen. He studied Blaine’s face – his bruises and cuts were healing although there were still reminders of his injuries. Kurt’s fingers reached out to tug Blaine’s curls very gently. He didn’t want to wake him yet but he couldn’t resist the cute spring of curls around his finger. He was enjoying the view. He was enjoying being able to simply take in the man he loved. Blaine stirred and drew his hand along Kurt’s side, drawing him closer. He murmured and snuffled gently against Kurt’s skin then nuzzled in to continue sleeping. Kurt was in heaven. He would have stayed there forever.

About an hour later, after a repeated pattern of dozing and gazing at the adorable creature snuggled to his chest, Kurt made himself slide from Blaine’s grip – it was either that or wet the bed. As he entered the bathroom he heard Blaine whine gently, “Kurt…” But when he returned from the bathroom Blaine was peacefully asleep again hugging a pillow. He pressed a kiss gently to his temple then slipped out of the room to join his dad for breakfast.

About the time Kurt was clearing the breakfast dishes, Blaine woke up to buzzing. He haphazardly slammed his hand down on the nightstand trying to find his phone then realized it must’ve been in his pocket still. He grumbled and sat up. A small pout framed his lips as he realized Kurt was not beside him. He yawned, rubbed his eyes then reached down for his pants to retrieve his phone. Part of him knew who it would be from. He had been ignoring the threats all week and didn’t know how much longer he could ignore them for. He had no doubt that the threats were real. He read the texts. His eyes widened and his breath became more rapid as the anxiety set in. “Please just leave me alone,” he whispered … “Please, please, please,” he chanted like a prayer. But he knew Tyler would never leave him alone – not unless Blaine did something about it.

Every time Tyler had hit him and left any type of markings Blaine had taken pictures of the injuries – at the time he didn’t know why he had because he thought he would never have the courage to report him. Now, though, Blaine was glad he had them – he had a feeling that before this nightmare was over he was going to have to use them – as much as he didn’t want to go to the police. He was still ashamed and embarrassed about the situation he had gotten himself into. He didn’t want to expose himself more than he had to.

So, he decided that he would first try to talk some sense into Tyler. Maybe if Tyler had closure – if Blaine could tell him once and for all that it was over – he would move on and leave him alone. He locked himself in the bathroom in case Kurt came up looking for him and dialed Tyler’s number.

“It’s about time you came to your senses, Blaine. Where are you?”

“Tyler. Listen. I can’t live like this anymore. You hurt me badly and I can’t put my life in jeopardy like that anymore. It’s over. Please stop with the threats. I would really appreciate...”

Blaine was cut off by Tyler’s laughter. “Do you really think you run this show?”

Blaine was silent, trying to process what to say next and wondering why he retreated into a scared child every time Tyler spoke to him. “I…”

“You, nothing,” Tyler growled. “Do you think I really don’t know where you are? Do you think I don’t know who you’re with? You are _my_ boyfriend and you walked out on me. Did you think I wouldn’t come for you? I know you’re shacked up with that sissy ex-boyfriend of yours. Once a cheater, always a cheater I guess.”

Blaine was furious at Tyler’s attack on Kurt but he was also scared. “Tyler, I’m not coming back.”

“You are. You are coming back right now or I will come to _you_ and you will hurt, Blaine.”

“I’m not scared of you,” he lied. “You can’t threaten me. It’s over. I’m moving on with my life and you should consider yourself lucky I’ve not called the police.”

“It’s not a threat. It’s a promise,” Tyler growled. “But, I will give you a choice. You can stay but if you do that sissy will be the one getting beat.”

“DO NOT THREATEN HIM,” Blaine startled even himself with his yelling. “Don’t you lay a finger on him, you son of a bitch.”

“Then come home. I know where and when his AA meetings end – in fact, he has one today. I think I’ll watch him from the parking lot like I did yesterday.”

Blaine’s heart stopped. “You’re lying…”

“Am I? He was wearing black jeans and a mint green Henley, wasn’t he?”

Blaine was silent. _Oh my God. Oh my God. He’s here. Tyler is here in Lima._

Tyler continued, “If you think I’m joking you will soon find out that I’m not. It’s him or you. You choose. You’re lucky I’ll grant you 24 hours to tell me your decision.”

Blaine hung up violently. He noticed that he was gasping for air as all of the oxygen seemingly was sucked out of the room. His entire body broke out in a cold sweat as he fell to the floor on his knees. _This can’t be happening, not again_. He became light headed as he could feel his chest start to convulse … and that is when he vomited.

+

Kurt met Blaine on the stairs. Blaine had just been on his way down to breakfast, not because he was hungry but because he knew Kurt would come looking for him. He had frantically tried to get himself under control after he had emptied his stomach but Kurt could see right through it. Blaine’s eyes were wet and red-rimmed. He looked pale and anxious. Kurt knew him well – there was no fooling him. “What’s the matter, sweetheart?”

There was no way Blaine could tell Kurt the truth. Kurt deserved better – he didn’t deserve to be threatened or to have to deal with such a dramatic life as his. “I’m fine. I think it’s just allergies.” Blaine kissed his cheek and pushed passed him and into the kitchen.

Kurt whirled and followed, “Blaine? You don’t look well. What’s really the matter?”

Blaine was scooping up a cinnamon roll which Carole had baked earlier, “no, no, I’m fine.” He turned to Kurt. “You going to your meeting today?” He desperately tried to change the subject.

Kurt’s eyes narrowed as he moved closer toward Blaine. He was getting a little irritated because he knew Blaine was hiding something. Maybe after last night Blaine had had second thoughts. Maybe he really didn’t want to try it again. Maybe it was all too much and too fast. Kurt panicked. “Please Blaine, tell me what’s going on.”

“Nothing, okay?” Blaine threw his plate on the counter and walked out through the sliding door and into the back yard, despite his lack of winter clothing. He sat down on a patio chair and slid his hands into his hair as he desperately tried to keep the tears at bay. He knew that he couldn’t fool Kurt but he couldn’t tell him either. He was a coward. A pathetic coward. Before he knew it Kurt was sitting beside him. He placed his hand over Blaine’s forearm. “Honey, you’re scaring me. Remember we said that we would be honest with each other? Remember we said we would help each other?”

Blaine wanted nothing more than to pull Kurt to his chest and hold him forever. Love him forever. He whispered in a shaky voice, “I just can’t. I’m sorry.”

“You can’t what?” Kurt’s chest seemingly caved in on itself.

“I can’t do this, anymore.” And suddenly Blaine stood and retreated up to his room and locked the door. He threw himself on the bed huddled in fetal position. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he chanted as this pillow became soaked with tears.

+

Kurt was unable to concentrate as he sat among others attending the AA meeting. He knew he was supposed to be present and that participating was the key to healing but he just didn’t have it in him. Something was troubling Blaine but what was worse is that Blaine was not being honest and forthcoming with him. That is what Kurt had always had an issue with – Blaine not being one hundred percent honest. It had started his senior year of high school when Blaine had become distracted and anxious but wouldn’t come clean until they had almost broken up – he had been scared for Kurt to move to New York and that he would be left behind. Next came the whole Eli fiasco – another notch in the Blaine-not-being-forthcoming list. Instead of talking to Kurt about he was feeling he ran off and cheated – although Kurt has now admitted that it was as much his fault as it was Blaine’s. Finally Blaine had lied about Tyler – he was being abused and when Kurt asked him about it he blamed it on kickboxing. Now he was doing it again. Kurt didn’t know if he … if they … could ever get past this.

“Kurt? Would you like to share how your week has been?” Marjory, the meeting leader asked.

“Oh. Um. It’s actually been bearable. I mean, I haven’t really felt like having a drink because I’ve been preoccupied with my boyfriend and my family.”

“So you have had support, then.”

“Yes. Amazing support.” Kurt was telling the truth but his gut rumbled in uneasiness as he thought about Blaine and how much longer he would have his support for … and why Blaine would not let Kurt in to support him.

+

_I’m okay but I need to go home – to Boston. I’m sorry Kurt. I’m sorry that I’m not a stronger person but I just can’t do this. I love you with my entire soul. Until we meet again… Blaine._

Kurt had read the handwritten note about fifty times. It had been taped to the front door when he returned home from the meeting. He hadn’t cried, which for Kurt was a big feat, but the truth is he was too angry. Blaine had abandoned him… _I’m not going to walk away this time_. Kurt knew that Blaine was battling something but why did he insist on running and battling it on his own? Was Kurt not trustworthy? Was it Tyler? Was it that Blaine couldn’t commit to Kurt anymore? Was it something else?

Kurt knew that he shouldn’t … he knew that it would be going backwards … he knew that he didn’t have Blaine to help him through this … he knew that Santana was not around to pull him out of whatever mess he would get himself into ... but, he was hurting and he was angry and he didn’t know how to cope. He placed the note on the table with a trembling hand. He grabbed his wallet and keys then slipped out the door.


	9. Broken

Blaine drummed his fingers on his own forearm as he hugged himself in the chair. He hated waiting. What he hated more was waiting for a flight that would take him back to his nightmare. What he hated even more than that was waiting for that flight with the man sitting beside him.

“You made the right decision, sweetness.”

 _If he calls me that again I’m going to vomit_ , Blaine thought to himself. “You really didn’t give me a choice.”

“There’s always a choice, Blaine. You made the right one. I know it’s because deep down you love me and you want this to work.”

He was going to be sick. He closed his eyes and thought about what Kurt must have thought when he read the note. He thought about how Kurt would blame himself. He thought about how Kurt wouldn’t be able to cope and he thought about how Kurt was probably half way through a bottle of whiskey by now. And it was all his fault. But the alternative was even more terrifying – Tyler laying a hand on Kurt – that was just something he could never live with. No. He would take all the pain. He would take all the hurt. He would willingly fall into the nightmare again if it meant Kurt would be safe. There was no other choice unless he went to the police but who’s to say he had enough evidence? Who’s to say that Tyler would be found guilty and go to jail? Who’s to say that Tyler wouldn’t find a way to hurt him and Kurt if he went to the authorities. Tyler would kill him. He may kill him anyway. Blaine knew the second he walked through that door in Boston he would get the shit kicked out of him. Why was he going willingly? Because Kurt. Because he was protecting Kurt. And because Blaine Anderson was broken and just didn’t have the courage to fight.

“Sweetness, come on. We have to board.” Tyler stood and held a hand out for him – as if he were a gentleman. Blaine ignored the outstretched hand but did get out of his seat and made his way to the gate and toward the plane leading him straight to hell.

+

Kurt sat on the now familiar stool at the bar - his double whiskey taunting in front of him, mocking him. He had ordered it. He had held it in his hand. He had smelled it and drew it up to his mouth but he had yet to actually take a sip. Kurt knew that one sip would be all it would take. Once he tasted the liquor and felt it warm his throat there would be no going back.

So he didn’t take a drink. There was something tugging his insides telling him to be strong – to man up. Was it Santana’s voice? Was it Burt’s voice? Was it Blaine’s? Or was it his own? Was the Kurt Hummel of the past infiltrating his way outward and trying to take command of this situation – of his brain and his heart? He lifted the glass again to his lips, he smelled the sweet aroma. He didn’t particularly like the smell or the taste but it was a means to an end. It was a way to make him forget, to take the edge off, to ease his nerves and anxiety - and his sadness. He was sad - sad for Blaine and sad for himself. How much longer would they go back and forth like this? How much longer would they allow themselves to be hurt because they were too scared to join together once and for all? What was blocking them?

Kurt thought way back to when he met Blaine. Why he met Blaine. Why he had let Blaine in. Was it because he needed directions? Yes. Was it because Blaine looked adorable in his navy blazer? Yes. Was it because of those damned hazel pools that summoned something inside of him he never knew existed? Yes. But Kurt knew the real reason. He knew the turning point. It was because Blaine gave him courage. Blaine helped him fend off the bullies – physically sometimes but mostly emotionally. Blaine gave him courage to stand up to Karofsky. Blaine gave him courage to go back to McKinley. Blaine gave him courage to get coronated as Prom _Queen_. Blaine gave him courage to leave Lima and go to New York despite NYADA’s rejection letter. Blaine. Courage. The words were sort of synonymous for Kurt. But Kurt also knew that Blaine had lost his courage. Blaine had lost everything.

He swirled the whiskey in his glass, watching as it coated the clear walls. It was then that Kurt decided that he would give Blaine just a little bit of what Blaine had given him. He would be courageous for Blaine. And he would give Blaine that courage too – not because he owed him anything but because he loved him. He loved him more than there were stars in the sky.

Kurt pushed the glass away. He picked up his phone and dialed.

Burt Hummel’s pocket vibrated. When he saw who was calling he answered it immediately. “Hey son, what’s up?”

“Dad. I need your help.”

+

Blaine felt like a dead man walking. The flight to Boston was just a means to get to his execution, so to speak. Tyler had been overbearingly sweet and attentive to him. Blaine knew that it wasn’t because he felt guilty or because he loved him. It was because that’s the way he always acted when he was about to blow up. Blaine couldn’t help but wonder if today would be the day, if he would even make it out alive this time. Blaine knew that he should do something, his better judgement was screaming at him to do something. He should run. He should tell. He should fight back – all those years of boxing and training. He had boxed because it was a good work out. He had boxed because he loved the smell of the leather gloves mixed with sweat. He loved the feel of leather hitting leather each time he punched the bag. It was somehow empowering - but to use his fists on a human? To use his fists to hurt someone? Blaine couldn’t bring himself to do that, even if it was in self defense – at least not in his _own_ self defense.

Blaine closed his eyes as Tyler slipped the key into the door. “After you,” he gestured with a smile.

Blaine stood frozen. He didn’t want to go in. He didn’t want the door to close behind him. He didn’t want to get beat up. He didn’t want to die. It was very possible that he would never ever see Kurt again if he walked through that door.

“I’m waiting,” Tyler said impatiently.

“I know what will happen once that door is closed, Tyler.”

“You deserve it with what you did to me.”

“No I don’t.”

“Get in or I’ll force you in.” Tyler gripped Blaine’s elbow.

As luck would have it, some neighbours came around the corner chatting loudly as they walked down the hall. “Tyler! Hey! How have you been?” They stopped to talk.

Blaine let out a breath of thanks at the interruption. And just then his phone buzzed. He dug it out of his pocket to read the message while Tyler was distracted.

_Blaine, I don’t know what is going on. All I know is that you left. But, I can’t accept that. We belong together and whatever is happening, I’ll help you through it. I’m coming. I’m coming to get you. I love you so much._

Blaine’s eyes pricked with tears. He felt just a little bit like he could breathe. Reading the text made his adrenaline spike even if it was only a little bit. Kurt was coming. Kurt was coming to help him. How did he deserve such a man? How could he even think to take all of Tyler’s abuse lying down if he had a man like Kurt to go home to?

“Get in,” Tyler demanded. Blaine was torn from his thoughts as he realized the neighbours had moved on.

“I won’t.”

“I will force you, Blaine. I swear to god…”

“If you lay a hand on me I will fight back. I’ve never fought back before but I will this time.”

Tyler laughed. He grasped Blaine by the lapels of his coat and threw him into the apartment.

+

Kurt and Burt had rushed to the airport. They paid way more than they should have for a last minute flight to Boston. Unbeknownst to them, they had only been two hours behind Blaine’s flight. Kurt filled Burt in on the note Blaine had left. He didn’t know Blaine’s situation. He didn’t know if Blaine was forced to go with Tyler or if he had gone willingly for other reasons.

But Burt knew better and he was able to fill in the blanks. He knew what Tyler was capable of. He knew how broken Blaine had been while living with him. He feared the worst and even though he didn’t want to make his son more anxious he had to tell him what he was really thinking. “Son, I don’t think Blaine left because he was scared of committing to you.”

“Ironically, I was afraid you’d say that.” Kurt looked out the small oval window at the darkening sky. “You think he went back to Tyler?”

“I think Tyler made him go back.”

“How can anyone make anyone do anything, Dad? He chose to go with him.”

“He’s broken, Kurt. He’s hurting. He’s suffered months of manipulation and abuse from this guy. He’s not in the right frame of mind to make clear decisions. Healing from something like that takes more than a week.”

A tear rolled down Kurt’s cheek. “A broken Blaine breaks my heart, Dad. I’m going to kill Tyler when I see him.”

“No you’re not. You’re going to help Blaine. If it comes to it, I’ll deal with Tyler.”

“No, Dad, your heart…”

“Screw my heart, Kurt. This guy has put Blaine and now you through hell. He put his hands on that sweet loving boy. He’s a bully. He’s a monster and if need be he will feel the Hummel wrath - but not from you. From me.”

“I don’t think I’ll ever feel better if I don’t break his nose myself, dad.”

“Blaine needs you to be there for him more than he needs you to break anyone’s nose. Plus, once I’m done with him he’ll be lucky if he only has a broken nose.”

Kurt slipped his hand over his dad’s. He felt uneasy. He felt anxious. He was worried sick for Blaine. But he was so grateful that Burt Hummel was beside him because he knew that together they would get Blaine back. He just hoped that they weren’t too late.

Burt squeezed Kurt’s hand, “oh, and kid, don’t think it went unnoticed that you didn’t touch that whiskey.”

Kurt looked into his dad’s eyes and took a deep breath. “I’d be no help to Blaine if I were drunk. I’d be a disappointment to you and to myself. I’m done with that. Done for good.”

Burt smiled. “I love you, Kurt. It’s nice to have you back.”

+

Blaine had managed to crawl into the bedroom. He would have crawled straight into a sewer if it meant getting away from the unconscious and bloody body that was strewn on the living room floor. He sat back against the dresser and rocked gently trying to forget what had just transpired. He wiped at the tears on his cheeks and found that he had smeared blood all over his hand. He must be cut but he didn’t know where because his entire face hurt. He knew it would swell and turn black just as every other time. He tried to suppress his sobs because every time he took a breath it hurt. He suspected he had broken ribs. He pressed his forehead to his knees as he kept rocking, he kept crying, he kept shaking. He couldn’t believe he had hurt another person. He couldn’t believe that he punched Tyler’s face until he was literally a rag doll in his grip. He had beat him unconscious and he would need to pay the price. He would need to turn himself in  … eventually because he didn’t know if Tyler was just unconscious or if he was dead and Blaine had been too scared to check. His head swam with the images of what had happened. Blaine had somehow become courageous. Not somehow. It was Kurt. Kurt’s text. Deep down inside Blaine no longer wanted to be a victim. He didn’t want to live in this nightmare anymore. And adrenaline must’ve taken over. He fought back.

The pictures in his mind were relentless. They kept coming at him in full colour – vivid and clear. Tyler had thrown him into the apartment. He remembered hitting the wall with his back and the back of his head. He saw stars and fell to the floor; Tyler was on him instantly. He fought back _._ He clutched at Tyler’s throat to try to push him off. He jerked his knees up into his stomach. He kicked at Tyler’s shins and ankles. They rolled around the floor, each trying to gain the upper hand. Blaine remembered looking into Tyler’s eyes at one point and seeing something in them he never had before – shock. And fear. And just like when a shark smells blood, Blaine’s adrenaline shot up. He wouldn’t be beat this time. He wouldn’t lie down and take it. Tyler needed to taste his own medicine. He needed to pay. Pain exploded throughout Blaine’s fist as he made contact with Tyler’s jaw. He _heard_ Tyler’s head snap back. So he punched him again, this time connecting with his nose. Tyler was experienced though and he got quite a few shots in of his own. He split Blaine’s lip and connected with his cheek, surely giving him an instant black eye. They jostled around the floor for a bit grunting and spewing hateful threats until Blaine was able to roll them over and kneel up above him. He grabbed at Tyler’s collar and punched him again and again. He lost count how many times his fist connected with his face. He lost his composure. He lost his innocence. He lost everything he ever stood for in this world. Peace. Kindness. Love. But he gained back his courage. And he beat Tyler into the floor until he was no longer fighting back – until he was limp, bloody, and unconscious.

Blaine sobbed hard on the floor of Tyler’s bedroom as he remembered what that felt like. For a split second he had been relieved. He had been proud. He had felt powerful. But as he looked at the mess that was Tyler’s face – barely recognizable – it all came crashing down. He was no better than the monster which put him in this situation. He had hurt someone - another human. He had almost (maybe even) killed a person.

No amount of courage and no amount of love could have stopped Blaine from drowning in sorrow and guilt. He leaned forward and vomited on the floor. He didn’t even have the self-respect to make an attempt to make it into the bathroom. He hated himself. As his sobs broke through again and as the tears created pathways along his bloody face, he fell over and into the fetal position. Blaine Anderson closed his eyes and let sleep (he hoped it was death) take him – and that is how Kurt Hummel found him.


	10. Healing

Blaine woke up to a familiar voice humming a familiar melody. He attempted to move his head but only did slightly because it hurt. It hurt a lot. He tried to open his eyes but only one would cooperate and even then it was only a slit of an opening where his gaze fell on Kurt sitting beside him with his own eyes closed. He was humming - humming their song. Blaine’s mind couldn’t help but follow along, reciting the lyrics silently to himself:

 _And there's no mountain too high_ _  
No river too wide  
Sing out this song and I'll be there by your side_ __  
Storm clouds may gather,  
And stars may collide  
But I love you  
Until the end of time

Blaine released a gentle involuntary sob which brought Kurt out of his reverie. His attention turned to Blaine to see that he had one eye slightly open, the other swollen shut. “Blaine, honey.” He scooted even closer, clutching his hand carefully – aware of the bruises and cuts on his knuckles. “How are you feeling?”

Blaine could feel Kurt’s thumb delicately wipe away his tear. “I feel like I want to die,” he croaked.

Kurt stiffened. Even with a slit of an eye Blaine could see Kurt’s reaction but it was the truth. He doesn’t want to live in a world where he has to fight to stay alive – where he has to hurt other people to stay alive.

“It will get better. You’re on pain medication but if it’s still unbearable we can have the doctor prescribe a stronger dose,” Kurt said gently.

“I can take the physical pain. It’s the emotional pain I can’t bear, Kurt. I hurt another person. I…” Blaine suddenly became aware at what he actually did. He tried to sit up in his bed but the pain in his ribs was too much and he just fell back onto his pillow. Kurt’s hand pressed very gently to his chest.

“Don’t try to sit up, honey.”

“Is he alive?”

Kurt’s breath hitched because he wasn’t sure how he felt about the affirmative answer. “Yes. He’s worse off than you. He’s in the hospital but he’s alive.”

“Thank God.” Blaine breathed.

In that moment it all came together for Kurt. Blaine wasn’t upset because he had been beat up. He was down because he had hurt another person. Blaine was always one to get along … or at least want to get along … with everyone. He saw the good in people. He gave the benefit of the doubt every time and granted endless second chances. He was gentle and kind - a lover, not a fighter. “Blaine…” he began.

“Kurt…” Blaine interrupted. “I’m sorry.”

“Hey. You have absolutely nothing to be sorry about.”

“I need to explain my actions.”

“You do not.”

“Yes. Please.”

Kurt could see that Blaine was becoming a little bit agitated and he wanted to save his boyfriend from further stress. “Okay. Okay. I’m listening. Just please take it easy.”

Blaine squeezed Kurt’s hand. “I’m sorry I ran out on you without an explanation. I’m sorry I’ve been weak and a coward. I … I love you so much and I was protecting you. I know it sounds stupid and I know that you hate when I hide things from you but Kurt … he’s wrecked me. I don’t know how to be myself anymore. I don’t know how to have a relationship.” The tears were falling freely now. “And when he threatened to hurt you I just couldn’t bear it anymore. I caved. I ran.”

Kurt blinked as he heard Blaine’s words. “He threatened to hurt me? How does he even know me?”

“Kurt, he was in Lima. I don’t know how he found out details but he knew where I was and who I was with,” Blaine said through sobs. “He knew our schedules and told me that if I didn’t go home with him that he would hurt you.” Blaine’s body trembled violently. “Kurt, I didn’t want you hurt. I couldn’t… I just… oh God, I would have never forgiven myself…”

“Shh, it’s okay.” Kurt was up and on Blaine’s bed. He carefully drew his arms around his sobbing boyfriend and held him tight, placing soft kisses into his curls. “I understand why you hid it all from me. I wish you hadn’t but I get it. It’s going to be okay, honey. We are going to get through this. Together.”

“Kurt, I never wanted to hurt him but it came down to either he hurt you, he hurt me, or I hurt him. I was fully prepared to take the brunt of it. I was prepared for him to hurt me … even-though I knew he could kill me … but that text you sent me … I … it … was perfect. I love you,” he painfully tilted his head to look up at Kurt. His hazel slit of an eye searched for the blue pools he loved so much. He had always found comfort in them. “Can you please forgive me?”

Kurt’s tears were streaming now and falling into Blaine’s curls. “There is absolutely nothing to forgive. But if it will give you closure, if it will help you, then yes Blaine I forgive you. I forgive everything. All I want is for you to heal physically and emotionally. And I want to be right by your side through it all.”

“You … still want to be with me?”

Kurt lifted up onto his elbow to look into Blaine’s eye. “Is that a serious question?”

Blaine nodded softly. “I thought you’d hate me for running or hate me for hurting someone to the point of hospitalization. Or, I just thought you’d hate me for every stupid decision I’ve made in my life.”

Kurt’s mind flooded with sorrow. _What did this monster do to you to make you think that I could possibly ever hate you,_ he thought. “You ran to protect me, you hurt him in self-defense, and there is no way I could ever hate you, Blaine Anderson. And deep down you know that.”

“I’m just so sorry for everything.” Blaine cried.

“You were scared. You were being manipulated. I will never ever hold that against you. God, when I found you in that apartment I was so scared Blaine. I didn’t know if you…” he stopped and took a breath; Blaine took the same breath with him. Kurt could feel that his body was still stiff and anxious so he let the thought go. He brought a hand up to his bruised face and caressed him as gently as possible. “Can I tell you something?”

“Mmhmm,” Blaine hummed, his eye closing at the feel of Kurt’s caressing fingers.

“When I saw that you had left, when I read the note, I was angry because I didn’t understand. I didn’t know the whole story so I assumed you just didn’t want to be with me anymore…”

“No, Kurt.”

“Shh. I know. I didn’t’ know how to cope so I went to Scandals.”

Blaine’s body shifted anxiously but Kurt continued, “I ordered my usual double whiskey. I looked at it, I smelled it, I toyed with it … for about an hour. But I never took a drink.”

Blaine clutched his hand, “I’m so proud of you, Kurt.”

“Do you know why I didn’t?”

“Tell me.”

“Because of you.”

“Me?”

“You. I thought back to our past … to all the times you have been there for me. You gave me the courage to push the drink away. I knew that you needed me and I couldn’t be there for you if I was drunk. I love you, Blaine Anderson and I want to be a better man for you.”

Just then Blaine’s guilt lifted a little bit. He wrapped his arm around Kurt and nestled into his neck. He didn’t know how long it would take to heal or if he would ever heal properly but he did know that whatever happened Kurt would be by his side and that made everything okay.

+

Two days later and Kurt found himself in Tyler’s hospital room. He had waited for Blaine to be distracted with nurses as they readied him for discharge. He knew there were no police officers around as they had already given their statements yesterday and had been told that they should have nothing to worry about. The case was looking like it would be going in Blaine’s favour, despite Tyler’s injuries. The pictures Blaine had taken previously with his phone were a God-send. And while Kurt was searching for the pictures he found all the texts that Tyler had sent which pretty much drove the case home. They are also what lead Kurt to take matters into his own hands.

He stood over a sleeping Tyler. He took a few deep breaths so that he wouldn’t lose control. Truthfully, he wanted to kill him. He wanted to hurt him badly. He knew the nurses’ schedules by now; they wouldn’t be bothering him – especially because he had moved the call button out of Tyler’s reach. Tyler’s head was wrapped with thick gauze and padding, his face was swollen and black – everywhere. His lips were stitched in three places and his nose was heavily crooked and bruised. Kurt didn’t feel one slight bit sorry for him. He placed his hand on Tyler’s shoulder and shook him violently. A painful moan was emitted as Tyler tried to open his eyes. He couldn’t; they were both swollen shut.

“Wake up you son of a bitch,” Kurt hissed. “You don’t deserve to sleep. I want you to be awake so that you feel every god damned shot of pain coursing through your body.”

Tyler’s hand felt around for the call button to no avail.

“Yeah, I moved it. No one is coming. It’s just you and me - Kurt. Blaine’s BOYFRIEND,” he growled.

Tyler managed to croak out one word, “please…”

“Shut up. You don’t deserve to talk. All you’re going to do is listen and listen carefully because I’m only going to say this once.”

Tyler’s chest rose with a deep laboured breath and fell back down as he exhaled. Kurt noticed that the rhythm became quicker. Tyler was nervous; he was internally panicking. _Good_ , Kurt thought.

“You took a beautiful and kind soul … someone who loved you … loved you more than anyone ever will because he sees the best in people … you took him and you wrecked him. And for what? Because you have anger issues? Because you were bullied as a kid? Because your parents never loved you? Because you are just a horrible person? Kurt’s eyes flickered in growing anger. “Well those reasons ARE NOT GOOD ENOUGH! No reason is good enough. There is absolutely no excuse for what you did. But you know what? Blaine is strong. Blaine is resilient. Blaine has a boyfriend and a family who love him and support him and will never leave his side.” Kurt paused as he heard Tyler sob but he really didn’t care.

“So, here’s what’s going to happen,” he continued. “You’re probably going to heal. Then you will be going to jail because if you don’t already know, the police have been informed and we have proof of all the abuse you administered. You’ll be in jail for a long time – most likely being someone’s bitch but eventually you will get out. And you better pray that by then you will have forgotten all about Blaine and you will stay the hell away from him because he will never in a million years have anything else to do with you.” Kurt took a couple more breathes to calm himself before driving it home.

“And let me tell you - if you ever threaten my family again I will kill you myself. I know your brain must be mush from the beating Blaine gave you but lucky for you I’m feeling generous; so I’ll tell you one more time to make sure you understand – and so that you know I’m _dead_ serious.” He leaned forward and spoke directly into Tyler’s ear, “mess with my family again and I. Will. Kill. You.”

With that, Kurt turned on his heels and walked swiftly out of the room without bothering to place back the call button. Once the door was closed he leaned back against the wall and took a deep breath. Confronting bullies wasn’t a new thing for him - he had been doing it all his life. But he had surprised himself because never before had he ever threatened to kill someone and he knew that if it came right down to it he could never actually do it – at least he didn’t think he could. There would be other choices he could make before it came to that. But Tyler didn’t know that and really he supposed that the bottom line was that he would do anything needed to protect Blaine because Blaine deserved to be protected and deserved to be loved. And Kurt would be the one to do both of those things for the rest of their lives.

+

A week later and they were back in Lima. Kurt and Blaine had decided to officially move into Burt Hummel’s house. There was no better place for healing than with family. Blaine had moved out of the guest bedroom and into Kurt’s. There was no point in resisting any more – although they still hadn’t crossed the sex bridge. Part of the healing process was being able to fall asleep in each other’s arms and wake to soft and tender moments together – it’s what kept them going – they knew they were working toward a common goal. They needed to heal individually so that they could be together. And they wanted to be together. They both knew there was no going back.

Blaine trudged in the door as he arrived back from his meeting with his therapist. Blaine had sought her out when he realized he needed help sorting his emotions – his feelings of guilt and self-loathing – he wanted to get better. He needed to get better. And even-though they had only had two meetings, Blaine could see the light at the end of the tunnel. He knew that he would be able to forgive himself and to love himself again, it would just take patience, time, and a whole lot of reassurance from his family.

“Hey you,” Kurt greeted him with a sunny smile and a kiss to the corner of his mouth.

“Mmm, hi. More please,” Blaine grinned.

“Mr. Anderson, what are you suggesting?”

Blaine grabbed Kurt by the ascot and pulled him closer. “I’m suggesting you kiss me properly Mr. Hummel.” He smirked and kissed Kurt straight on the lips, dipping his tongue in momentarily just to tease.

Kurt wrapped his arms around Blaine’s shoulders, “I just don’t want to hurt your face, honey.”

“It’s okay now. It may look battered but it doesn’t hurt anymore.”

“Well in that case, come here” Kurt pressed harder this time, kissing Blaine like his life depended on it. They remained in the hall for a long time with their lips latched to each other. It was heated but sweet and loving.

“Kurt, put the man down! You haven’t let him get past the entrance way,” Burt’s voice boomed from the kitchen.

“I don’t hear him complaining,” Kurt groaned but then winked at Blaine.

“How was your appointment, son?” Burt poked his head out of the kitchen to make sure Kurt had in fact put him down.

“It was good; I like Isabelle. I think she’ll be able to really help me,” Blaine said happily.

“I’m glad, kid,” Burt smiled. “Now come on. I’ll need you two to keep your hands off of each other long enough to try Carole’s infamous baked chicken.”

“And I made your favourite dessert,” Kurt grinned proudly.

“I’m a spoiled man,” Blaine said with a smile and followed the Hummels into the kitchen fully intending to never ever keep his hands off of his beautiful boyfriend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song - Come What May from Moulin Rouge.  
> Of course, I don't own it.


	11. Mine

It was late spring in Lima. The weather was turning warmer and the trees were in full bloom. Kurt sat in the backyard of his father’s house, rocking on the swing as he caught up with Santana over the phone.

“When are you coming back, Kurt? I miss you.”

“Soon,” Kurt said with a smile. “I’ve decided to reapply at NYADA and Blaine is having his Berklee credits transferred to Julliard. All should be ready for the upcoming fall semester.”

“I guess I better start looking for a permanent roommate,” Santana murmured.

“Aww, I’m sorry honey. I just … I don’t want to be apart from him – not ever.”

“I know. And I don’t want you to be apart from him either. I’ll miss you but I know that wherever you live you’ll give me a key so that I can check up on you two troublemakers any time I want.”

Kurt grinned because he knew it was true. “Okay, but you know what a sock on the door means.”

“You’re gross, Hummel.” They both laughed.

“But you love me anyway.”

“More than words can say,” she said.

+

Kurt had finished his conversation with Santana and was now making a celebratory dinner. What better time to try the new recipe he found for eggplant parmesan? He and Blaine had received the best news from the Boston Police Department. Tyler had pleaded guilty to domestic abuse and assault charges. As soon as he healed enough to leave the hospital he would be transported straight to jail. Eight years. Eight years of hell is what Tyler got and although Kurt was happy about that – he didn’t think it was nearly enough for what he did to his boyfriend.

Burt and Carole would soon be home from work and Blaine was on his way from an errand he had to run. Kurt was carefully cutting the eggplant into large oval discs when he felt arms circle his torso from behind. He set the knife down and smiled, pressing back into the familiar warmth. “I missed you,” Kurt whispered.

“Not more than I missed you,” plump and warm lips were pressed to the back of Kurt’s neck.

“What do you think you’re doing to me, Mr. Anderson?”

“I … _kiss_ … am … _kiss_ … trying … _kiss_ … to … _kiss_ … gain … _kiss_ … your … _kiss_ … attention … _kiss_ … Mr. … _kiss_ … Hummel … _kiss_ …”

“Oh, I think you’ve got it and then some,” Kurt swooned.

“Good,” Blaine turned him around by the hips and smiled into his eyes. “Because I have a surprise for you,” he rocked up onto his toes barely able to contain himself.

“You know I love surprises,” Kurt kissed his nose.

Blaine slipped his hands into Kurt’s intertwining their fingers. “You and I have been through so much pain this past year and especially recently. And I know we are still both works in progress but we are healing – and healing together. Kurt, I am so grateful for you and I love you so much.”

“I love you too,” Kurt interrupted with watery eyes.

Blaine placed a chaste kiss to the corner of Kurt’s mouth. “I booked us a little weekend getaway so that we can re-connect … properly,” he blushed softly and pressed his lips together. “I’m ready for our next step, if you are.”

“Oh, Blaine,” Kurt hugged him tight. “I’m ready too. I’m so ready.”

+

A little more than half-way into the drive, Kurt was convinced that Blaine had planned a weekend in Columbus; but when Blaine kept driving through the city (after a stop for some food) Kurt’s curiosity was peaked. “Where are you taking me, Blaine Warbler?”

“I told you, it’s a surprise.”

“There’s nothing more interesting in Ohio than Columbus.”

“Yes there is. You.”

“Flattery will get you everywhere,” Kurt quipped.

“Remember that for later,” Blaine said with a smirk and a chuckle.

Two and a half hours after they left Lima, Blaine pulled into Logan, Ohio. It was a small town and not much different than Lima but when they entered the Cedar Falls property Kurt’s jaw hit the floor. “Blaine, this is absolutely gorgeous.”

“Isn’t it?”

“Look at all the trees and the cute cabins! Blaine!”

Blaine gave himself an internal pat on the back. He had known Kurt would like it here and he loved making him happy. “These cabins are the standard ones. I booked us a luxury one.”

“Blaine, you didn’t have to do all this you know.”

“I know but I wanted to. You deserve it.”

They parked and after Blaine checked them in at the main cottage, he led Kurt up a set of stairs to a beautiful tree-house log cabin overlooking greenery and a rose garden. Kurt stood on the porch taking in his surroundings. It was very secluded, peaceful and beautiful. When Blaine opened the door and led him in Kurt gasped at how adorable and romantic it was. It was small and quaint. The décor was a marriage of rustic and Victorian. Kurt fell in love with it, instantly. He moved around the living room in a gleeful state as Blaine followed. They checked out the small but modern kitchen, the cute but functional bathroom then the cozy but immaculate bedroom. “Blaine, there are rose petals on the duvet!” Kurt squealed.

“I know, honey. I requested them.”

Kurt was so overwhelmed with that statement. Blaine did this. For him. For them. He lunged into Blaine’s arms and hugged him tight. “You are the best. Thank you, this is exactly what we need.”

“I’m so happy it’s gotten the Hummel approval,” Blaine grinned. “Now come on, let’s check out the gardens then we can come back here and order room service.”

“They have room service here?”

“Of course. You didn’t think either one of us would actually be using the kitchen did you?”

“No. I suppose not. Not for cooking anyway,” Kurt gave Blaine a sly grin, making him blush.

“Kurt!”

+

The gardens were spectacular. They had every natural colour of rose possible along with a variety of other flowers and shrubbery. It was well landscaped and gave off a fragrant aroma. Kurt’s favourite part about it though was the small path that led to a large clearing where a fire pit was situated. It would be perfect for the evening where they could curl up with a blanket, roast marshmallows and drink hot chocolate. Blaine really had outdone himself.

They moved on, taking a walk around the grounds. There were a lot of people around but it didn’t seem crowded because everything was so well spaced out. They wandered into the restaurant and decided to have dinner there instead of ordering in. It was nice to be out together again. Kurt had missed this and now that he had it back there was no way he was going to lose it again.

Blaine lifted his glass (filled with iced tea), “to new beginnings,” he said quietly, giving Kurt a bashful gaze.

“To us,” Kurt added as they clinked their glasses together.

Blaine ordered steak while Kurt decided to try the crab. They ate among soft conversation and comfortable silence. They took their time devouring their food and each other with soft longing gazes and shy smiles. There was no denying they were in love. More in love than they had ever been.

After they shared a generous piece of German chocolate cake for dessert, they decided to walk back to their cabin making a pit stop at the spa so they could book appointments for next day. Kurt wanted the relaxing satin scrub and mud wrap treatment while Blaine wanted to go for the more adventurous warm bamboo massage. They booked both as well as couples facials and pedicures to Kurt’s insistence - although Blaine didn’t give any resistance.

Once they were situated in their cabin and curled up on the couch, Kurt pulled Blaine into his embrace. “Hey you, thank you for doing all this. I’m having a wonderful time.” He kissed into his curls.

“It’s my pleasure, honey,” Blaine sighed happily. “But the night is not over yet. Do you want to go roast some marshmallows?”

“I think I want to save that for tomorrow night. I’m quite comfortable staying right here with my arms wrapped around you.”

Blaine shifted so that he could look into Kurt’s eyes. He murmured softly, “it is kinda perfect, isn’t it? Just being here with each other.”

“Not perfect yet, Blaine.”

Blaine lifted a brow, gently. “Oh? Did I forget something?”

“Yes. You forgot to kiss me. I haven’t been kissed in so long,” Kurt whined even-though he knew it had only been minutes.

A grin smeared along Blaine’s lips. “Oh, my bad. How could I have forgotten such an important detail?” He inched closer and kissed Kurt’s lips delicately. His tummy fluttered as heat spread from his heart all the way down into his groin. Their kiss intensified and within minutes, Blaine was completely on top of his boyfriend, devouring every square inch of his face and throat.

“Blaine, are you sure…”

“I’m sure.”

Kurt closed his eyes. It had been far too long since he’d been intimate with Blaine. It had been more than a year since they had made love. Deep down in his heart he knew they were ready and he wanted it so much. It had been torture to have Blaine around him – so close to him – even sleeping in the same bed and not able to ravish him. But they had made a promise to each other to wait until the time was right for both of them. Judging by the deep ache in his gut and by Blaine’s worshipping tongue, the time was right. It was so right.

“B-Blaine…” Kurt moaned.

“My love,” Blaine’s voice was muffled and hot against Kurt’s neck.

“I love you so much. I want you so much.”

Blaine lifted his head gently, “I’m right here, baby and all yours.”

Kurt mewled, “mine, mine, mine,” as he pecked at Blaine’s lips.

“Come on,” Blaine lifted off of him and held his hand out. “Accompany me to our bedroom,” his hazels were lustrous, even more-so than usual.

They kissed their way clumsily into the bedroom. Their nerves were eveident as their shaky hands disrobed one another but they remembered how to do this. Their hearts were guiding them as fingertips caressed bare chests, arms, and hips. Rose petals still adorned the white duvet as Kurt lay Blaine down. His body nude before him except for snug fitting boxer briefs - and he could see that Blaine was already very well aroused. A whimper escaped Kurt’s lips as the hunger grew in his gut. “You are so beautiful.”

A silent blush. Blaine gazed upward at his boyfriend. His creamy chest was gorgeous in the soft light of the bedside lamp.

“And you _are_ mine,” Kurt continued. “Every square inch of you is mine, Blaine Anderson.” Kurt hovered over Blaine but his mouth dipped down until it was touching flesh. He kissed every morsel while whispering “mine” in between each kiss. First, he kissed each curl, “mine.” His eyelids and lashes, “mine.” His forehead, “mine.” His nose, “mine.” His cheeks, “mine.” His lips, “mine.”

He worked lower along his jawbone and throat. He took his time pecking a trail along his clavicle and paused to suckle a soft bruise into the hollow between the bone and his shoulder. “Mine”. He moved down and peppered his chest, along his defined pectoral muscles, pausing at each nipple to suck greedily. “Mine, mine.”

Blaine was on fire. It had been so long since he had felt Kurt’s mouth on his body. During the past couple months they did have some heated make out sessions and of course they kissed but they had never allowed themselves to go much below the neck. He whimpered as Kurt worked him over, purring out “Kurt…”

Kurt was lapping at his abdomen now, his lips almost hopping down each rib and placing kisses along them, “Mine.” His tongue snaked out and trailed along his taut stomach, nuzzling along the dark trail of hair below his navel, “Mine.” His fingertip tugged the waist of his boxers down just a little so that he could access each hip bone, placing loud kisses to each one, “Mine, mine.”

Blaine was squirming now. His voice was husky and filled with lust. “Kurt… I want…” His fingertips reached down to tug very gently at Kurt’s chestnut hair. “Please…”

Kurt slid Blaine’s boxers down delicately and slowly, as if he was unwrapping a gift. And this was a gift. Blaine was his eternal gift. His tummy rumbled once he revealed Blaine’s throbbing and thick erection. “So gorgeous, Blaine. You are perfect for me.” He pressed his nose to the underside of Blaine’s cock, which elicited a long and feral moan from Blaine’s lips. “Ohhhh Goddddd…”

Then Blaine felt Kurt’s lips press to the rigidness of his shaft. His hips thrust upward as Kurt teased him, pecking kisses all along the base, “mine, mine, mine.” And lower, nuzzling his lips to his balls, “mine,” and between Blaine’s cheeks. He pressed in, his tongue lapping at the warm puckered entrance. Kurt’s voice muffled, “mine.” And that’s when Blaine lost himself.

Kurt was startled at first when he heard and felt Blaine cry, but he soon realized that his boyfriend’s sobs were not sorrowful or filled with pain. They emitted happiness, relief, and unabashed love. Kurt scampered up so that he could gaze into Blaine’s wet eyes. “I love you.” His hand caressed his cheek as his mouth closed on Blaine’s to stifle all the sobbing. Blaine broke the kiss slowly, enjoying the soft pecking and suckling before he spoke, “I love you too and if you don’t make love to me I think I might die.”

“We can’t have that,” Kurt grinned. He moved to retrieve the small bottle of lube he had wisely placed in the bed side drawer. He kissed Blaine again then moved down to continue his work. His mouth instantly pressed to the inside of Blaine’s knee, “mine”, and thigh, kissing and suckling, “mine.” Blaine widened and let his bent legs fall away from each other, giving Kurt all the access he needed, offering him everything. Then suddenly, he felt a cold fingertip against his entrance.

It had been a long while since Kurt heard Blaine’s babbling. He had almost forgotten how arousing it was – how much he loved it. “You’re beautiful,” he murmured as his mouth continued to kiss along his legs and his lubed up finger pressed gently in.

“Holy shit, Kurt” Blaine’s voice was urgent and his hands went immediately to Kurt’s shoulders, squeezing. “Please, baby, I need more.”

“In time, my love,” Kurt said gently. He wanted to take Blaine _right now_. His bulge was thick and aching against the fabric of his briefs but he needed to take his time for Blaine’s sake and he wanted to enjoy every second of this. His finger slipped deeper and began to pump and soon he was able to add a second finger, massaging Blaine from the inside out making him moan continuously.

“Kuuuuuuuurt, Kuuurt, Kurt.”

“Mine,” Kurt murmured as he watched his boyfriend come undone. Then without warning, his lips pressed a kiss to Blaine’s leaking tip and slid down his shaft, engulfing him into his mouth.

“FUCK.” Blaine was wrecked. He could only whimper as Kurt expertly blew him … and his fingers … God, yes! And Kurt was no better. He was slowly coming undone by Blaine’s babbling and thrusting. He slipped in a third finger, stretching him, preparing him for the cock that was now aching painfully.

Kurt’s tongue lapped broadly all the way up Blaine’s cock, suckling at the engorged tip before murmuring again, “mine … all fucking mine, Blaine.”

“Yesss. Everything’s yours. All of me.” Blaine panted.

With that, Kurt drew up onto his knees, pushed his briefs down desperately, squirted a generous amount of lube onto himself, his hand rubbing it in. He was grateful that both of them had had the foresight to get tested when Blaine was in the hospital – they were both clean which meant no condoms, which meant they would _truly_ be united. With these thoughts in his mind, Kurt was unable to wait any longer, he pressed then sunk into Blaine’s ass. His sweet, hot, tight ass. Kurt lost his mind - but then froze. The feeling was too much, not enough, yet perfect. The emotions were fresh and new yet familiar. It was like coming home. Tears sprung into Kurt’s eyes as he lowered himself down – chest to chest, bringing one of Blaine’s legs with him, exposing him, opening him up for a better angle. His face nuzzled into Blaine’s throat, breathing him in … and he felt Blaine’s hands all over him, caressing his back, gripping his biceps then sliding into his hair and tugging.

Kurt moved. He thrust then stopped because oh my God, he was already so close to coming. He had to will himself to calm down.

“Fuck me,” Blaine pleaded. “Kurt, I need you to fuck me.”

So he fucked him. Kurt’s thighs and hips were relentless as they drove into his boyfriend. But even-though it was hot and feral, they were making love – because he loved this man and this man loved him. Kurt’s head was spinning with emotions. His cheeks were wet with tears. His body shone with sweat as his rhythm picked up. The feel of Blaine’s engorged and throbbing cock trapped between their stomachs made Kurt drive into Blaine harder and harder until neither of them could hold off any longer.

“Kurt, Kurt … I need … I’m going to … I love you…” An abundance of sticky hot cum coated Blaine’s (and Kurt’s) stomach as he _cried_ out - his chest heaving in pure emotion and lack of oxygen. His trembling legs wrapped around Kurt’s waist coaxing him deeper with each thrust until Kurt came too – filling his sensitive ass as he babbled against Blaine’s throat, “Blaaaaainnne, fuck fuck fuck.”

They stayed that way for a while, murmuring and rocking as they both came down from their highs. Their muscles trembling, their mouths softly panting, and their hearts united. Kurt remained half on Blaine unable to move despite their sticky bodies. They were silent but they said everything. Once the blood started to filter back into Blaine’s brain he realized he was cold and reluctantly extracted himself from Kurt’s body. He returned with a bottle of water and a warm washcloth, cleaning Kurt first then himself before settling back under the covers with his boyfriend wrapped up in his arms. Kurt kissed his chest softly as he laid his head against it. “I love you.”

“Hmm. And I you,” Blaine hummed as he drew hearts along Kurt’s bicep with his fingertip. “I could stay here forever with you.”

“Let’s”

A smile smeared Blaine’s face. “Okay.”

A few more minutes passed by. Kurt’s eyelids were heavy with sleep as he curled closer into Blaine. He thought he would fall asleep in this position and he was completely okay with that. His eyes fluttered closed but then opened again gently when he heard Blaine begin to softly sing, his voice husky and raw:

“Walk to the other side

May as well enjoy the view

So roll down the grassy hills

Find your long lost youth

Love the one that got away

Wonder what tomorrow says

But the future starts today

 

You're beautiful, beautiful

My dear

Oh, my dear

 

You're beautiful tonight

Laugh until we see the light

But the light was already here

 

I can see it now and it's

All so clear”

 

Blaine’s voice broke about half way through but he kept singing, whispering the melody into the dimly-lit room, his palm rubbing gently along his lover’s back. When he stopped he heard what he had already felt – Kurt’s gentle sobbing. 

“It’s not finished but it’s the beginning of a song I’ve been working on the past couple of weeks. I’ll play it for you when we get home if you like.” 

“You … wrote that?” 

“Of course. For you.” 

“It’s beautiful, Blaine. Thank you.” He placed a delicate kiss to Blaine’s wet chest. 

Blaine kissed into Kurt’s hair, “beautiful, like you.” 

Kurt couldn’t’ believe that just a couple months ago he was passed out drunk and high in a stranger’s apartment - lonely with pain in his heart. And now, here he was – sated and completely in love with the man of his dreams who had just written and sung a song for him. He could and would stay in this man’s arms forever. 

Blaine’s heart was full and his soul was happy – a drastic change from how things were a few months ago. And he had Kurt to thank – this beautiful man who loved him unconditionally and with all his heart. His eyes fluttered closed, letting sleep start to take him as he held his man close to his chest. 

“Blaine?” 

“Mhmm?” 

“Will you marry me?” 

Blaine’s eyes flew open. He nudged Kurt as he sat up. He needed his eyes. He needed to look into his eyes. And he did. Blue pools held his gaze as he tried to grasp what Kurt had just asked him. 

“What?” He whispered. 

“Blaine Anderson, will you marry me?” His voice was soft, angelic, and sure … and the regard of Kurt’s eyes, the genuine smile on his lips told Blaine that he was serious. Beyond serious. 

“Kurt? … Yes? Oh my God, YES!” 

Kurt slid up and captured Blaine’s mouth. He knew it was out of the blue. He was never planning on it but his heart was insisting. His heart needed this. He knew that Blaine would eventually be his husband one day – he just didn’t want to wait. And after all they’d been through, they didn’t need a grand gesture although Kurt was already planning a fabulous engagement party in his mind. 

Blaine broke the kiss gently and pressed his forehead to Kurt’s. Both of their cheeks were wet and warm. “On one condition,” Blaine added. 

Kurt lifted a brow and Blaine laughed at how adorable he looked. “The condition is that you allow me to take your last name.” 

“Well, yes. But the real question is whether it will be Anderson-Hummel or Hummel-Anderson.” Kurt said. 

“No,” Blaine said seriously as he settled back down on the bed pulling Kurt beside him - this time, forehead to forehead. “I mean, just Hummel. I want to have your last name and only your last name. And I want our children to have it too.” 

Kurt closed his eyes and took in a slow breath. He needed a moment. The man he loved just agreed to marry him on the condition that he could take his last name – his father’s last name. And he wanted to have babies with him. How on God’s green earth did Kurt Hummel get so lucky? He opened his eyes and gazed into those beautiful golden hazels he loved so much. “Kurt and Blaine Hummel. It’s perfect.” 

“Perfect,” Blaine agreed and kissed his fiancé’s lips once more before he finally let sleep take them. 

That’s how they slept – forehead to forehead, heart to heart, and with their hands clasped together - that night and every night thereafter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you've all guessed, Blaine didn't really write that song ;)  
> It's an excerpt from The Light Was Already Here by Alex Preston and I don't own it.
> 
> Thanks so much for reading and commenting. I really enjoyed writing this one. I have a few others in my back pocket so stay tuned. :)


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